Monday, April 19, 2010

I've Had It Up To Here....

Blame it on a around-the-clock cable news, cell phones that allow us to capture a moment and publicize it to world instantly via the internet and a general pop culture overload – we, as a people, tend to get burnt out on a lot of things quicker than we use to. 

I don’t know how you feel….but I have had it up to here with news that Larry King, CNN talk show host and certified geezer, is getting a divorce.  Let’s be realistic – Larry King getting a divorce for the seventh or eighth time really shouldn’t qualify under the category of   news.  Larry King staying married longer a double run of his night time TV show is news.  You see, Larry gets a divorce just like he buys suspenders.  When Larry’s favorite suspenders don’t hold up his pants anymore he just throws them away and gets himself a new pair -- when his marriage starts to tank, he gets a divorce.  

It wasn't news when Larry King was able to sweet talk a beautiful woman into marrying him, but when that beautiful woman and Larry conceived a child together  that was news – only because the thought anyone having sex with Larry is so repulsive.  (Close your eyes and imagine Larry doing ‘the wild thing’ with a woman that’s young enough to be his first son’s girlfriend – are you choking on your own vomit at that thought?). 

Anyone who marries Larry King knows that like day leads into night -- marriage leads into divorce and I’ve had it up to here with people trying to convince me his divorce is news.  It’s not…I don’t care and I’ve had it up to here.

Next subject:  Jesse James

Let’s state the obvious:  Jesse James is an asshole.  You don’t marry America’s sweetheart, Sandra Bullock, and then cheat on her with some cheesy ass dancer/former model from an adult nightclub who has huge “factory installed air-bag boobs” and Nazi swastikas tattoos on her body.  You just don’t do shit like that, Jesse.  On top of that – you could have done something to prevent all this news coming out about you and your crazed sexual libido long before one of the biggest nights of Sandra’s life happened  – the night she won her first Academy Award.  C’mon Jesse, where’s your class! 

It’s not the fact that Jesse James cheated on Sandra Bullock that pisses me off – it’s a miracle that news of it didn’t come out any sooner – because when you look at his choice of mistresses – discretion wasn’t something he was concerned about and  it’s obvious that he will do the ‘nasty’ with just about anything.  His marriage to Sandra Bullock gave him a free pass in to a world of respectability, but he's done kissed that ‘respectability pass’ good-bye because of  his love of “Nazi F---king” 

The person that I feel sorry for in this whole ordeal is Sandra Bullock.  What did Sandra do to have to be humiliated by such as low-life cretin as Jesse James?  Absolutely nothing.  Bullock has literally been in hiding since the news of Jesse’s cheating came out and you know that one day she’s going to have to face the cameras and speak about this ugly mess that her “loving husband” has put her in.  She shouldn’t have to do it, but there’s not a whole lot she can do to avoid it. 

Meanwhile – there’s Jesse James and the stories of him being in some sex rehab in Arizona.     From me to you , Jesse – the Dr. Drew’s of this world can’t save your ass on this one.  You remind me of Nixon’s henchmen during Watergate era who used God and being “born again” to cleanse them from all of their crimes.  It didn’t work then and it’s not working now.  I’ve had it up to here on this one, Jesse, don’t go blaming screw-up on an addition -- own up that you’re an asshole and fall off the planet, ok?

I’ve also had it up to here with John McCain’s gift to the world that just keeps on giving and giving and giving – I’m talking about none other than Sarah Palin.  It’s nice to see a failed Vice-Presidential candidate go back to her home state and resign from her elected job as governor half-way in her term go make twelve million dollars last year talking how our elected representatives in Washington need to be booted out of office.  Yet, her supporters will tell us that it isn’t fair to criticize Mrs. Palin for not completing her term as governor, but she sure does love criticizing those politicians who work out the terms that their constituents elected them to.  

I also find it funny that Sarah Palin is always blaming “the mainstream media” about this and that – but when is she going to put two and two together and realize that her employment by Fox News now makes her part of the mainstream media.  If Fox News is the most popular news network (that’s what they call themselves) and they have the ratings numbers to back them up that they are more popular than MSNBC or CNN (two organizations that I consider “mainstream media”) then her employment by Fox makes mainstream just by association. 

And dear Mrs Palin – you don’t want your family criticized or attacked by the media – then do us a favor – don’t parade them on stage wherever you go like they’re part of the show.  If you use them to portray family values you better expect to be called out on it when that family of yours doesn’t live up to what’s being sold.

I have literally had it up to here – when it comes to anything and everything that is Sarah Palin – the sad thing is – Sarah Palin isn’t going to head into the political sunset for a long time – we can just hope that “gotcha” wink and a nod will catch up with her and she can live out her golden years in Alaska eating Moose fritters or something like that.  It's a nice thought -- until then...we're just gonna have to grin and bear it.  

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