What The Hell......

Going To The Dogs With Rachael Ray In My Quest For Free Stuff

2011-12-23T03:38:00.001-05:00

(l-r) Teco, me and Tinker

I’m like a lot people out therewho enjoys getting free things. I haven’tfell victim to the online e-mail hoax where people believe that Microsoft willsend them a hundred bucks if you just forward a special e-mail to ten people. The only reason I haven’t fell victim to thisis because I know it doesn’t work – if it did I would have exhausted my e-mailaddress book sending those “please forward this e-mail” message to my friends along time ago because I like free stuff.

In my quest for free stuff, Isigned up for an online service that sends you an e-mail daily with links forall kinds of free stuff. I have gottenall kinds of free stuff – like samples of all of Nescafe’s instant coffeeblends (which were actually pretty tasty), packets of a vitamin C beveragepowder, samples of Splenda and lots of other things that I can’t remember rightoff the top of my head.

This week, I received a freesample of something that I was actually looking forward to receiving – a sampleof one of Rachael Ray’s dog food products that she talks about on hersyndicated show. The product that I receivedwas “Just 6” – from Rachael Ray’s line of Nutrish©brand of super premium food for dogs – and I was looking forward toserving it to my two dogs Tinker and Teco – unfortunately my dogs were thatexcited about seeing it in their dishes.

You wouldn’t think that dogswould have a discriminating palate – I mean – dogs sniff each other’s ass, licktheir own butts and have been known to actually eat their own shit if it smellsright to them – that doesn’t sound like they are too discriminating to me. My dogs can be fussy though. They love Old Roy’s Kibbles and Chucks fromWal-Mart and both of my dogs will actually eat their favorite kibbles andchucks and leave their least favorite pieces scattered about around their bowls– that’s discriminating. I have servedthem Kibbles and Bits from Purina in the past and they’ll eat it – but theyhave ways of letting me know that they would rather see Old Roy from Wal-Martin their dishes and not the more expensive blend from Purina.

I was kind of hoping that when Iopened up the “Just 6” packet of dog food from Rachael Ray that my dogs wouldlook at this food as something of a treat – I mean Rachael is selling it as a “superpremium” dog food (and, I’m assuming, at a super premium price, too). The first dog to “experience” Rachael Ray’sdog food was Tinker and her first response once the aroma of the food hit hernose was to rub her nose all around her bowl as if she was burying it andhoping that it would go away.

When I put a bowl of “Just 6”under Teco’s nose – his first inclination was to back off from it like it wasoffensive to his sensitive nose (a nose that has never been offended when he’sgotten under the covers when I go to bed at night and have let loose a good olestinky ass Dutch oven fart).

Hey Rachael Ray – I appreciatethe free dog food – but my dogs think it sucks….but if you’re interested insending out some more free stuff – I wouldn’t mind a set of your cookware andknifes. I promise that I won’t bury itin the backyard and I’ll let everyone know how great it is – not only becauseyour products are great – but I like free stuff.

Just Bloggin' Around: My Latest Rants and Raves

2011-03-06T17:31:00.000-05:00

New on your supermarket shelves -- and a must-have for any party, get-together or just plain munching in front of the television set -- pick up a bag of new Ruffles Molten Hot Wings! You'll thank me for them later.

Hey, if Charlie Sheen can do it – I can too – the following entry to this blog is just me ranting and raving about anything I feel like I want to rant and rave about. Unlike Charlie Sheen – this isn’t being written by someone who’s brain has been fried with enough cocaine to give every man, woman and child in America a good buzz and I don’t have hookers and porn stars at my beckon call (just a couple of dogs and they’re getting up there in age).

Local TV News

I don’t know how you feel – but don’t you think local TV stations in America have gone a little bit overboard with “team coverage”? Whether it’s reporting on corruption in local government or severe weather – it seems like TV stations are blowing up a report that could fill maybe five minutes and stretching it out to eternity with special “team coverage”. It seems like they get all of their reporters zeroed in on that one story that the pool of reporters is so stretched they have to have the blonde traffic reporter go out and cover “real news” which only leads to more embarrassment for the news organization.

And here’s another thing about television news that gets my goat – a newscast is a program that disseminates news it is not “a show”. I have heard local news people and network people call their news cast “a show” and I could just scream. If you want me to take your news cast and what you report seriously – then take your own newscast seriously by calling it a news program. A newscast is a news cast and a show is what Mickey Rooney and Judy Garland did in the old movies to raise money for the war effort or what Ed Sullivan use to host every Sunday night on CBS. Are you journalists or entertainers? Journalists inform and entertainers entertain – choose sides and label what you are correctly, please.

Celebrity Apprentice

I know that “Celebrity Apprentice” is not the “must watch” reality TV show that it once was – but like a moth attracted to light – I’m attracted to “Celebrity Apprentice”. The new season of “Celebrity Apprentice” starts tonight (March 6^th) and it’s a gonna be a doozy with such celebrities as Star Jones, David Cassidy, one of the housewives from the “Real Housewives of…” reality show on Bravo, LaToya Jackson (the only member of the Jackson family who doesn’t have any discernible talent), singer Dionne Warwicke (who is no longer making any money with the psychics, former baseball player Jose Conseco, rock singer Meatloaf and everyone’s favorite celebrity crazy – Garey Busey.

Ah, Garey Busey – we couldn’t get enough of him on “Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew” – now we get to watch him get all fired up in the boardroom with “the Donald”. Busey versus the Trumpster – this is gonna be better than Big Time Wrestling. And, you know that if he last more than one or two episodes of the series – Busey is going to do or say something so outrageous that it will give America a chance to see what Charlie Sheen is going to look like if the drugs don’t kill him.

Is the Big Gamble Paying Off – American Idol 2011

Is it just me or is this year’s “American Idol” on Fox better than you expected it to be? Fox had a lot riding on this year’s Idol with some of the biggest changes ever on the show beginning with the arrival of Jennifer Lopez and Steven Tyler as new judges. I expected Jennifer Lopez a judge in the Paula Abdul mold who wouldn’t say anything bad about the performers on the show – but Steven Tyler seems to have taken the old Paula Abdul judging approach. It’s also surprising to see Randy Jackson taking on the Simon Cowell role where everything that he says about the performers is guaranteed to elicit boos and catcalls from the audience members. Let’s just hope that Randy doesn’t start wearing those tight fitting t-shirts that Cowell use to wear on Idol. The one thing that Randy doesn’t have is the wit and talent to sling barbs and insults back at Ryan Seacrest like Simon could – but Ryan doesn’t have to fight with Cowell anymore to be the center of attention on the show.

Speaking of Cowell – there are rumors going around that former Idol judge Paula Abdul will be joining him on the panel of his new Fox talent show “The X-Factor” when it premieres later this year. The “X-Factor” job could not have come at a better time for Abdul who’s dance show on CBS tanked in the ratings and will not be picked up for another season.

Burger King vs. McDonald’s

Anybody who knows me knows that food really isn’t food unless you can order it through a drive-thru window and it’s handed to you in a bag by some pimply high school kid trying to make a few bucks for weed. McDonald’s advertising lately has been centering on their McNuggets and their BBQ Chipotle Angus Burger and the advertising has enticed me more than a couple of times to drive through the golden arches and the results of those visits haven’t exactly thrilled me.

Anyone who has read my Facebook status lately knows that I wasn’t exactly thrilled with McDonald’s BBQ Chipotle Angus burger. If my memory serves me correctly I said that this burger was basically a salt lick between a bun and the barbeque sauce left a bad taste in my mouth and the smell of the sauce on was enough to make one sick. The ads were right about the sauce – McDonald’s slops a lot of the sauce on this burger (which caused some of it to drip on my shirt) but it’s not enough to save this burger. If I maybe be blunt – the McDonald’s BBQ Chipotle Angus burger sucks and it’s sad that a cow had to be sacrificed to become my personal “Unhappy Meal”.

Another item that has been advertised a lot on television lately has been the “Stuffed Steakhouse Burger” at Burger King – the burger that’s been stuffed with jalapeno peppers and chunks of cheddar cheese. The way they described the burger and how it looked on TV and my love of BK’s A-1 Steakhouse burger was enough to get me to take a light fantastic trip to the BK drive-thru window – but it was a disappointing and wasted trip. If you expect some heat from the jalapeno peppers in this burger you’re going to be let down. You would expect a burger with all of those chunks of cheese to be cheesy – but you get more cheese taste in their dollar double cheeseburger.

And let’s talk about chicken nuggets – is it me or has quality control at McDonald’s taken a dirt nap – because I can remember McNuggets tasting a whole lot better than the ones that I tasted recently. At one time I could make a lunch of a twenty piece McNugget and a side of fries and leave Ronald’s place happy, but not anymore. There seems to be more batter or something on the chicken nugget that doesn’t make them as tasty as they once were. If I wanted the taste of batter – I would get to McDonalds in the morning and order a side or two of their pancakes – but I wanted some tasty McNuggets and I didn’t get them.

When it comes to chicken nuggets – Wendy’s spicy chicken nuggets (from their value menu) with ranch dipping sauce and a side of their new natural cut fries with sea salt can’t be beat. If you haven’t been to Wendy’s lately – it’s worth the trip there just to grab an order of their fries – they are so tasty that you don’t want to drown them with any ketchup

Quick Takes

Frito-Lay is doing some promotion with their Ruffles brand of potato chips and asking people to vote for their favorite flavors online. They currently have two new flavors on the shelves with one of them being “Molten Hot Wings” and I don’t care what other flavors they throw out there – these chips win hands down. Ruffle Molten Hot Wing chips actually taste like hot wings and there’s a little bite (not a whole lot) to them too. If you see a bag of these chips on your supermarket shelves – pick up a bag or two and if you’re interested more in this Ruffles flavor promotion go to www.facebook.com/ruffles.

If you’re looking for cheap buffalo hot wings (along with a delicious hot and sour soup) – take my suggestion and go to Empire Wok on M-21 Lapeer – it’s worth the trip. Empire Wok is one of the most affordable Chinese buffets in Michigan and their food is delicious and you can’t beat the lunch or dinner prices. A recent trip to Empire Wok for lunch ended up costing me a little more than sixteen bucks for two people and that’s with a tip included – which is pretty damn affordable.

Well…by looking at the length of today’s blog, I think it’s time for me to say goodbye or as my old friend Dave Barber would end his radio show – “It’s time for me to count my tips and say good-bye”. So, until we meet again via the written word – keep the grin above your chin and good thoughts in your head.

Another Tale of Frustration: Dealing With DirecTV

2011-02-08T02:17:00.000-05:00

On our last visit – I shared with you some of the frustrations that I have been having and I promised that I would share my frustrations with DirecTV and that’s exactly what I’m going to do. As many of you know – and even the casual reader of this blog can easily figure out – I love TV – what I don’t like is when I can’t watch television because of an equipment malfunction and that’s what lit the fuse in one of my recent frustrating moments.

I live in an area that is not served by cable. Even though Comcast has wired the area everywhere around where I live – they have not wired our street where I live – plus, I wouldn’t have the rat bastards at Comcast wire my home for anything. So, if I want to enjoy television I have only two choices – hooking up an antenna (which isn’t a great solution because I am miles from a grade A television signal) or hooking up with one of the satellite television providers. I chose the later. At one time, I subscribed to Dish Network – but I changed to DirecTV after Dish took one of the channels that we liked and pushed it into the next tier of programming.

I instantly liked DirecTV from the moment that they hooked us up. DirecTV comes across as a little more professional operation than the Mom and Pop approach that Dish has. Plus -- with DirecTV we were able to get more channels than we had with Dish and they also provided us a DVR with our service.

I never thought that a DVR was that big of a thing – only because I never owned one – I always looked at it as a glorified VCR – boy, was I wrong! The pause feature when you’re watching something live has been a godsend for us folks with aging bladders. With our DirecTV DVR – we can pause through any one of the ka-zillion prescription drug commercials on the nightly news so we can take a piss and not miss a moment of Brian Williams and the news. Can the poor folks in some third world country pause the programming on their TV set – I don’t think so!

Well, you can imagine my frustration on a recent Sunday morning when the picture went out on our DirecTV and my girlfriend went through all of the “do-it-yourself repair” fixes that they tell you to do but to no avail. When the do-it-yourself fixes don’t work, I know that you have to get on the horn and talk to someone directly about your problem – which is what I did. I was hoping that there was a way to fix it, because I couldn’t bare the thought of losing everything I had recorded that I had yet to watch – such as –

1) The last six episodes of last season’s “Rescue Me”

2) The last three recent episodes of “Parenthood” and “The Good Wife”

3) About a week and a half worth of “Conan” and “The Late Show With David Letterman” (including the episode of Letterman where he admitted having sex with an intern)

4) A few movies that I had yet to watch such as “Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas” and “The Dark Knight”…..

Plus, I had recorded a bunch of different episodes of “Dora the Explorer”, “The Cat in the Hat”, “Angelina Ballerina” and “Thomas the Train” for the grandchildren for when they come to visit.

DirecTV is like every other company that you call in that you have to deal with a bunch of recorded prompts to get you to a live person (who can be anywhere from in your own hometown to Bumfuck, Egypt – luckily DirecTV’s representatives are right here in the good ole USA) And just like every other company’s recorded prompts – you usually end up yelling into your phone receiver because the “prompts” didn’t catch what you told them and you have to go through the whole process again….but 4eventually you will reach a live human being.

When I finally reached a human being on the other end of the line and I told her what my problem was – she went through the whole process of what I could do to fix my DirecTV receiver. I explained to her that we did everything but put our finger on my head and twirl around the living room and the receiver still didn’t work to which she explained that she would send us a new receiver – this is where the real fun begins.

“Mr. Frost, we can ship a new receiver to you and you can have it in a couple of days,” the DirecTV representative said on the phone.

“And will there be a charge for the receiver,” I asked.

That’s when she went on to say that there would be no charge for the receiver, but there would be a twenty-one dollar and some odd cents charge for the shipping and handling.

“That’s not acceptable,” I responded. “You’re going to charge me shipping and handling for a receiver that I pay an additional fee for each month to receive programming that you charge me dearly for…I don’t think so.”

And that’s when I was put on hold – which eventually lead to me getting disconnected and hearing a dial tone on the end of my telephone receiver….which meant another phone call back to DirecTV and another ten minutes or so getting connected to a live person and telling that person the whole story. And like the previous DirecTV representative – they were a little startled when I told them that I wouldn’t pay for shipping and handling for a new receiver….to which I was put on hold again.

When the DirecTV representative returned to the phone, I was informed that they would waive the shipping and handling fee and that I would receive the new box in a couple of days and I could hook up the new box.— to which I confronted them the fact that I would not hook up this box and couldn’t they send someone to my home to hook it up for me. I was informed that the instructions to hooking up the receiver are easy and I responded that I don’t care how easy the instructions were – I wasn’t hooking up their box. I’m of the opinion that for the money that I pay DirecTV each month for programming, it only behooves them to hook up a god-damn receiver for one of their customers. This DirecTV representative didn’t see it that way – so, I told them that they could disconnect their damn service and I’ll just get my satellite TV programming from Dish. I was put on hold again….but not for long….but when the “voice” returned – it wasn’t the same person that I was talking to and I had to go through the whole story all over again.

So – the story was retold again for the third time. My box doesn’t work. I’m not paying for shipping and handling for a new receiver and I’m not going to hook up the new receiver myself – you can send a service person to hook it up or you can disconnect my service and I’ll go to Dish. Plus, I added another wrinkle to my frustration – I had been on the phone nearly two hours with them and had been disconnect once and redirected to two other people – with me having to retell my story each and every time. If I can’t get any satisfaction from you people at DirecTV – cancel me out and I’ll call Dish.

I was put on hold again – but not for long – and I was forward to another department – the name escapes me right now, but this is the department that they send people that are extremely pissed and only people in this department has any authority to make it right. This DirecTV representative apologized for all that I went through and told me that they would send a service person to my house the next day and that there would be no charge for the box or the service call – because I have been a loyal customer since 2008. When I asked him why the first person that I talked couldn’t do what he was doing for me in the way of customer service – he didn’t have any real answer – but he apologized for all of the hassle and the inconvenience.

The next day – a local DirecTV service person arrived at my door with a brand new receiver – complete with a new remote that actually works with the flat screen television that we bought last year….and like all good stories – “and they all lived happily ever after.”

(It should be noted that my DirecTV service is bundled with my telephone service and the day after we received the new box from DirecTV…I noticed something on the DirecTV portion of our phone bill. A week before all of my hassles with them – they decided to give me three months of Showtime, Movie Channel and Sundance as a “loyalty gift”. Nice, huh? If only they had some decent movies on these channels!)

Tales of My Personal Frustrations - Episode #1

2011-02-02T15:16:00.001-05:00

The east wall at Dr. McJoke -- where none of these contraptions were used during my visit.

It’s been awhile since I have written anything in this blog, so let’s make up for some lost time and allow me to vent a little bit about frustration. We all get frustrated – sometimes it over some of the dumbest things, such as when someone cutting you off and stealing your parking space, or going to the store and forgetting to pick up the item that you went to get in the first place, and even something like not being able to beat your best Pathwords score on Facebook can frustrate you.. Me – I get frustrated when I look at what my doctor is charging for an office call and spending two hours on the phone with DirecTV that could have been solved during the first five minutes of my phone call to them.

Recently, I spent a couple of days in the hospital because the pain in my back got so bad that I literally could not walk. I had to have an ambulance take me to the hospital – which is a little humiliating, because it’s not some life or death reason that I had to go to the hospital – I was simply in so much pain that I couldn’t walk. I could imagine what some of my neighbors were thinking when they saw an ambulance parked in our driveway and the gossip that they were spreading around to the other neighbors and even family members – and that kind of justified the cost of what the ambulance company was going to charge me for this trip to the hospital.

I have nothing bad to say about my hospital visit. Not too long after I got there – they shipped me down to X-ray where they took about five or six pictures of my back and then it was back to the emergency room. In the emergency room – I was given a shot for the pain and the warned me ahead of time that this shot would help with the pain and I would feel it….and they were right. I have never really dabbled in the drug scene in the 60s and 70s – but if they would have had stuff like this shot back then – I would have signed up for getting wasted and fried back then. This shot that they gave me in the hospital was great – it’s too bad they didn’t provide loud rock music and a light show to go with it – but then everyone would be going to the emergency room, right? I know that the tuna sandwich that they gave me in the emergency room was the best tuna sandwich that I have ever had – could it have been that shot they gave me?

After going over the X-rays and the blood that they took from me they decided they were going to keep me – so, I got a nice room to myself on the fifth floor at Port Huron Hospital. For two days – I stayed in my hospital bed watching television with an IV pumping fluids in me. And just like any hospital visit – every time that you close your eyes and go to sleep – a nurse will come in to give you some meds or, in my case, shoot some steroids in my IV line. It was on the second day when they saw me walk down the hall with my cane like I never had any pain in my back at all that the hospital gave me my walking papers to go home. The hospital readjusted the meds that I had been taking and advised me to see my family doctor within a week…it’s when I went to my family doctor that the frustration began.

Unlike the medical shows on television – my family doctor is no “McDreamy” – but he’s quickly becoming a “McJoke” and I’m really questioning where I should continue to see him after this last visit. This visit really wasn’t a whole lot different that my usual visits with him – except – he went over the diagnosis and findings that they hospital sent over to him. We went over the blood work that I had done a week before (which is something we do every ninety days or so) and he told me that the X-rays at the hospital showed that I have degenerative arthritis and some nasty spurs on my vertebrae – plus I was suffering from dehydration. The hospital also recommended that I sign up for some therapy and that was the extent of the whole visit to my doctor. Then – I get the bill!

My doctor’s normal office visit is $125 – PLUS – there’s a charge of $20 for an A1C test and $5 for then to take a glucose reading of my blood (which I already did at home an hour or so before I got it his office, but naturally they can’t accept that reading). All of these charges come as no surprise to me – it’s what comes next that gave rise to my blood pressure and becoming outright pissed.

Along with all of the charges above – I am also charged an additional $150 – why? The official explanation goes as follows: “Prolong Physician service in the office or other outpatient facility requiring direct (face-to-face) patient contact beyond the usual service”.

When I called his office and talked to the billing department – she, like the good solider that she is, told me that Doctor McJoke thought that this visit was different than previous visits. I told her it wasn’t longer than any of my past visits and he really didn’t do that much except go over the hospitals diagnosis and give me a script for physical therapy. The woman in billing said that when Doctor McJoke went over the hospital report – he felt that he was spending more time with me than he normally does and according to his rules or what ever, he can charge extra. The billing manager sounded a little pissed when I asked her if I should bring a stopwatch on my next visit with to see Doctor McJoke. She pretty much told me in her official capacity as the head of billing for Doctor McJoke that there really wasn’t much I could do about the extra charge and that’s when frustration set in.

There is something that I can do about it. One, I can confront Dr. McJoke the next time that I come in to see him and piss him off because I’m bringing up what I have to pay him for his services. Or two, I can tell Dr. McJoke to kiss my ass and I can find another doctor who’s a little more compassionate about his or her patient’s concerns. That’s the decision that I have got to make, but in the meantime, I just get more and more frustrated when I think about this whole ordeal.

Next: Frustration #2 – Dealing with DirecTV.

Let's Get Real -- A Look At My Favorite Reality TV Shows

2010-12-05T20:00:00.001-05:00

What a week for reality TV! Another season of “Hell’s Kitchen” on Fox-TV is coming to a close and it’s hard to believe that any one of the chefs that Chef Ramsey put through the drill this season is capable enough to put polish sausages and nachos together at a local 7-Eleven – but this coming week he’s going to pick one of the remaining two chefs to run his L.A. restaurant with a paycheck of something like $250,000.

“Hell’s Kitchen” is one of those guilty pleasure reality TV shows. The premise of the show is the same season after season with twelve chefs of varying skills trying to win the top prize – which is usually being the head chef at one of Chef Ramsey’s restaurants (the ones that are still open and haven’t filed for bankruptcy protection as of yet) – it’s just watching how incompetent these competing chefs are in just being able to complete a service. Each and every season there is a chef or two that is your basic ‘fish out of water’ who is seeing the big city and bright lights in Hollywood for the very first time. Then, you have those one or two chefs who think that they know everything who get a rude awakening when Ramsey lets them have it with a verbal tongue lashing.

There’s only one week left to “Hell’s Kitchen” and it’ll be interesting to see who he finally picks to win the whole kit-and-caboodle – but that won’t be the end of the exploits of Chef Ramsey on television – because this Wednesday night BBC America is rolling out another Gordon Ramey reality TV cooking show. This time – it’s not just chefs competing to win some outlandish grand prize – it will be restaurants. Who knows what he has in store for this competition? The only way to find out is to tune in to BBC America this week and find out – (and to sound cliché) – check your local listings for time and channel.

While I like to watch Chef Ramsey’s reality TV shows – I will admit that he is the master of “junk reality TV cooking shows” – but luckily there’s something out there for the more serious minded reality TV foodie and that’s “Top Chef” on Bravo. I would love to see Carla Hall for season five win it all – but once I start picking favorites – they’re bound to lose.

A new season of “Top Chef” began last week and the twist to this season is that all of the chefs competing are runners up and just-about-made-it chefs from the previous seven seasons of the show. Eighteen chefs in all will be competing to win this season’s top prize and the competition is fierce and if you’re a fan of the show – you will already rooting for your favorite chefs. One thing that all of the chefs this season know is that you won’t be able to give the judges food that taste like crap and get away with it.

Anthony Bourdain has joined Tom Colicchio, Padma Lakshmi and Gail Simmons at the judging table and he has already pissed off one of the chefs this season with his “spare no feelings no bullshit” comments. I know that I will never ever taste a quarter of the dishes ever presented on “Top Chef”, but I love watching this show.

Dr. Drew's team at the Pasadena Recovery Center

Another reality show returned for its fourth season last week – “Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew” (Thursday nights, 10pm VH-1 and at various other times throughout the week) and I love this show. Watching “Celebrity Rehab” is a lot like slowing down your car near a train wreck – you really shouldn’t be watching it but you’re drawn to it like a moth to a light bulb.

If you’re looking for some really famous people going through the rehab experience on television for your entertainment pleasure – you’re not going to find a lot. The biggest star of the bunch would have to be actor Eric Roberts, who has starred in a fair amount of movies and is also well known for being the brother of “Pretty Woman” Julia Roberts.

Tiger Woods ex-mistress, Rachel Uchitel is another one of the people going through rehab with Dr. Drew, but you won’t hear Tiger Woods name mentioned at any time on the show, although you’ll get an earful of how she has been physically and sexually abused all though her life.

The biggest human train wreck this season would have to be former 70s heart throb Leif Garrett who life of drug abuse makes Celebrity Rehab season one patient Jeff Conaway (of the movie “Grease” and the TV show “Taxi”) look like he’s a friggin’ eagle scout.

The asshole of Celebrity Rehab’s season four patients would have to be Jason Davis – the spoil rich grand kid of businessman of Marvin Davis. In the first two episodes Davis has done his best to piss off one-time model and reality TV start Janice Dickinson with cruel comments her looks and plastic surgery.

Even though Season four of “Celebrity Rehab” is not packed with stars – I feel that this could be one of the most interesting seasons of the show and if any one of these celebs advances to “Sober House” (another Dr. Drew VH-1 show)…I will be surprised.

[Small side note: If you’re a fan of Dr. Drew – you be able to see him a lot more often than on his VH-1 rehab shows. Dr. Drew has just signed on to do a nightly talk show on CNN’s HLN network after the beginning of next year. I’m assuming his show will follow Joy Bahar’s show and air from 10-11pm.]

Well, we all know that there’s nothing more real than what we see on reality TV and I’m going to quit writing this and watch some of it. What can you say…it’s only TV!

It's Only TV: Dancing With The Stars Goes Shotgun and Other TV News

2010-11-17T17:46:00.000-05:00

A New Way To Vote For Your Dancing With The Stars Favorite –

You Just Kill Your TV Set

How many times have you been watching television and what you were watching pissed you off so much that you have wanted to throw a brick through the TV screen? Or better yet – the program that you were watching pissed you off so much that you wanted to do an “Elvis” and pull out a handgun and kill you TV set with a couple of pulls on the trigger? Well...someone has done just that and it took Sarah Palin’s daughter Bristol Palin’s appearance on “Dancing with the Stars” to put this guy over the edge.

An armed and intoxicated 67-year old Wisconsin man with bipolar disorder was watching “Dancing with the Stars” on Monday night and got a little angry by Bristol Palin’s appearance on the show – so angry that he fired a shotgun at his television set. His wife got the hell out of the house and phoned the police to report the incident saying that her husband was also threatening to commit suicide. It took the police fifteen hours to coax this man out of his house and charge him with second degree reckless endangerment and all it took was the site of Bristol Palin on TV to do take him over the edge. He felt that Bristol Palin was only on the show because her mother is somewhat famous (i.e.. former Republican candidate for Vice-President of the United States and half-term governor of the state of Alaska – as well as being a soccer mom and a famous Mama Grizzly) and that she wasn’t on the show for her dancing ability.

Hey, I’m not bipolar, but I have to agree with this guy that the only reason that Bristol Palin is on DWTS is because of her Mother’s notoriety (as well as her being the unwed mother who now preaches abstinence) – the question this guy should have been asking before he blew the shit out of his television set is – how in the hell has she lasted this long? Any one who has watched the show this season would have to agree that there have been far better dancers voted off this season than Bristol Palin. I will give Palin credit for have improved herself on the dance floor since week one – but there is no way that she is a better dancer than former NBA star Rick Fox or pop singer Brandy (who was voted off this week).

Personally, I would like to know who is voting for Bristol Palin? Trust me – there are just as many people who can’t stand her Mother as there are people who think that she’s actually qualified to run for any kind of public office. If the people who are voting for Bristol because of her mother – I want to know where the other half is on Dancing with the Star’s voting night? Maybe Fox News will send out one of their fair and balanced news reporters to ferret out this story and report the truth. Think again.

Trying To Make Something Old New Again

I was surprised to read on thewire.com about two “new” projects in the planning stages at Warner Brothers pictures. One of the projects in the planning stages is a remake of the old NBC-TV show “The Man From U.N.C.L.E”. Nobody has yet to be cast to play the roles that made Robert Vaughn and David McCallum famous – I just got to question why they are even attempting a big-screen version of this TV show. UNCLE isn’t one of those old TV shows that people get nostalgic about – but Hollywood is also doing a big screen version of the TV show “Dallas” – so maybe they think we’ll see anything these days from television in the 70s and 80s.

The other project that Warner Brothers is working on is a remake of “The Wizard of Oz” with Roger Zemeckis (“Back to The Future” and “Forrest Gump”) on board as director. No one has been cast for this remake. I wonder if you’ll be able to watch this new version will be Pink Floyd compactable – like the old version is for some people who like to watch the movie with the sound down and using Pink Floyd’s “Dark Side of the Moon” as the movie soundtrack.

NBC Is Still Having a Bad Year In Prime Time

And They Can’t Blame Leno for This One

I have very few “must see” TV shows and it looks like one of them is about to be a victim of NBC’s incompetence at building a prime time schedule that people want to watch. It was announced yesterday that NBC will be moving a few shows around in the hopes that people will discover them. For example – NBC will be moving my favorite show “Parenthood” to Monday nights at 10 against one of CBS’s biggest hits of this season – the remake of “Hawaii 5-0”. It doesn’t matter to NBC that the audience for “Parenthood” has been building week-to-week against some really tough programming Tuesday nights on ABC and CBS…they’re going to move the show anyway. All I have to say is “dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb”. When you have a show that is a fan of the critics and is a marginal hit with the viewers – you don’t move it and make viewers of the show search for it…you let the show build.

NBC is also going to test how scripted comedy shows in the Thursday 10pm slot will do since their scripted dramas in the 10pm slot aren’t bringing viewers to the tube. If you’re a fan of “30 Rock” – look for it to find a new home at 10pm in the not too distant future.

And NBC is bringing back Jerry Seinfeld’s “The Marriage Ref” in January – which should give everyone enough time to find a couple of good books to read while they air this show. As much as I loved Seinfeld – the “Marriage Ref” rubs me the wrong way. If this is the best that Jerry can do – I recommend that he hang around in the kitchen with his wife and find more vegetables to hide in their kid’s food.

Talking TV: From Andy Dick to a Masturbating Bear...The Whole Truth Tanks While Trailer Trash TV Gets Renewed Through 2014

2010-10-31T02:18:00.000-04:00

TV…TV…TV! There’s lots to talk about…so, put down the remote, grab a cup of Joe and light one up (if you got ‘em)…we got some TV talkin’ to do.

His Name Says It All

One of Andy's more famous mug shots after being arrested

Andy Dick – one of the stars of the sit-com classic “Newsradio” and a frequent target of C-list comedians on those celebrity roasts on Comedy Central; plus – one of the more recent celebrities to have gone through Dr. Drew’s Celebrity Rehab on VH1 has been caught with his pants down (so to speak).

The website PopEater.com is reporting that Andy Dick allegedly flashed some patrons earlier this week at Café Audrey in Hollywood, California. It all began when he kissed his male companion on the mouth and then he allegedly exposed his “little Andy” before leaving the Café in what PopEater.com is calling “a drunken stupor”.

This isn’t the first time that Andy has gotten into trouble with his drunken behavior – all you got to do is Google his name for a list of all of the instances – but who knows – maybe Dr. Drew will give him another shot at cleaning himself up on an upcoming season of “Celebrity Rehab”.

Fans of Andy Dick can look forward to his next “direct to DVD” movie in the not too distant future. Dick, along with Screech (from TV’s “Saved By The Bell”), are the two marquee stars in a comedy being filmed in Flint and Ann Arbor titled “Tetherball” – which it will be safe to say will make the Will Farrell’s “Semi-Pro” movie with scenes filmed in Flint look like an Academy Award piece of film making.

ABC Says, “You Want The Whole Truth?

You Can’t Handle the Whole Truth

When it comes to lawyer dramas on television these days – nobody can touch “The Good Wife” on CBS – but television likes to beat a successful genre to death once they have a hit – so we had a few new lawyer dramas premiere this season. CBS dusted off “The Defenders” format from the 60s with Jerry O’Connell and buffoon Jim Belushi and the people at ABC gave us a more original lawyer drama with “The Whole Truth” starring Rob Morrow and Maura Tierney – make a guess which of these two shows just got cancelled? Yup, it was “The Whole Truth” that just fell under the ax! It is not known when or where ABC will air the remaining episodes of the series – but they have pulled the show from its Wednesday night 10pm time slot for at least the next two weeks.

Wanna Know What The Weather Is?

Don’t Look To The Weather Channel

Remember when you use to go to CNN to see what the news was? Now CNN and all of the other ‘news channels’ are populated with talk shows and talking heads with news nowhere to be found. It wasn’t that long ago that you could turn to the TV Guide channel when you needed to know what was on television – but now that channel is filled with off-network reruns and reality programming. MTV barely shows any videos – even the Gospel Music Channel is showing family movies and TV shows like “Highway To Heaven”….the only channel that is sticking to what they originally started out as is ESPN, you want sports – ESPN is there for you!

If you are one of those people who look to The Weather Channel for weather when you want it – you’re going to be in for a big surprise. NBC/Universal (the current owners of The Weather Channel – which won’t be that much longer since cable giant Comcast has purchased NBC/Universal) will soon be revamping the format with weather-related reality form programming – such as “Storm Stories” and programs like that. You’ll still be able to get your local weather on the Weather Channel – but you’re going to have to look at the scroll at the bottom of your screen to find out what’s what weather-wise.

Will Conan Be Seeing A Courtroom Soon?

Conan's Masturbating Bear

Conan O’Brien’s new show on TBS is set to debut on November 8^th (11:00pm with a replay at 1:00am) and he is planning to bring back some of his signature bits and characters that were a part of his years at NBC – such as The Masturbating Bear – and everyone is wondering what NBC will do. NBC lawyers could go all nuts on Conan and claim that all of the characters and bits that he did on NBC are intellectual property of the network and slap a cease and desist order on him.

The latest issue of Vanity Fair features an excerpt from New York Times reporter Bill Carter’s new book on last year’s Tonight Show struggle between Conan and Jay Leno and once you read it, you just might understand just why Conan might like to see a confrontation with his old employer in a court room.

In a recent interview with Rolling Stone magazine, Conan is quoted as saying, “What I really wanna do is be sued over the bear and then appear in court with the masturbating bear.’Your Honor, this bear can't help himself!'"

Fans of Trailer Trash and DNA Tests – Rejoice!

If there were ever two television shows that point to a dumbing down of America – Jerry Springer and Maury Povich’s daytime show (you can’t really call these shows talk shows) these two shows would lead the pack. What is also sad about these two shows is that they are also syndicated around the world for people to see and the impression of the Americans that people is not that flattering. These shows are going to go away any time soon – as a matter of fact -- NBC/Universal Domestic television has announced that Springer and Maury have been sold to local station groups through September 2014. I think a blank television screen would be better than these two shows – but I don’t think watching someone find out if he’s the baby’s daddy to be entertainment.

Well…that’s going to do it for this little visit. Until we meet again via the written word – remember to pay your cable/satellite bill and choose your programs carefully….not that it really matters, because we all know – it’s only TV!

They Just Don't Make 'Em Like That Any More -- Junk Food From Our Youth

2010-10-25T15:33:00.002-04:00

Any one who reads this blog with any regularity knows that I love to talk about food and I’m not going to stray to far from that subject with this entry – but instead of talking about food that’s readily available now – I’m going to take a food journey blast to the past. Yup, I’m going to talk about food that you just can’t get any more – but we still remember today.

For example: Anyone who grew up in the 60s and 70s can remember those Banquet Cream Pies in the frozen food section at your local grocery store – they sure were tasty – especially the chocolate cream pies. The only time that I ever saw them in our house though was when they were on sale for thirty-nine cents at Feke and Yott (Hickory Meat Block) on Franklin Street on Flint’s east side. I am almost positive that there was nothing in the ingredients of these pies that could be considered “cream” by today’s FDA standards – but nonetheless – these pies with the graham cracker crust sure were delicious. They gave your tastebuds the illusion that what you might be eating was ice cream – but there was no way in hell that you could get an ice cream pie (with those chocolate shavings on top) for thirty-nine cents – this was a pie that was conceived by the food chemists at Banquet – much like the food chemists at Proctor and Gamble (the soap people) created the potato chip that isn’t a chip – Pringles.

I visited a couple of stores recently to see if I could find a Banquet Cream Pie in their frozen food shelves and, just as I expected, they were nowhere to be found. Banquet no longer makes them – just like they no longer make those single serving plastic bags filled with frozen roast beef and gravy, chipped beef, chicken ala king and single servings of a salsbury steak and gravy. Ok, I want a show of hands – how many of you people use to make chicken ala king on toast and with Banquet’s frozen bags of chicken ala king that you pop in a pan of boiling water on the stove to cook (you got to remember – this was pre-mircowave junk food)? My mouth is watering just thinking about them.

Here’s another item that they don’t make anymore – Chef BoyArDee’s complete spaghetti dinner in a box. Remember the box with the box of spaghetti, the can of sauce and a can of the cheese that you sprinkled over the top of the spaghetti – well, they don’t make ‘em anymore. I have been able to find a kit that is basically a box of spaghetti and a packet of seasoning to put in some tomato sauce to make spaghetti sauce – but not the complete spaghetti dinner in a box that we remember as a kid. This had to be one of the first junk food dinners put on the market and America ate it up.

(Chef BoyAreDee still makes those box pizzas that I’m that everyone enjoyed eating as a kid. The pizza didn’t taste anything like real pizza – but we didn’t care – we weren’t corrupted by Little Ceasar’s or Dominos yet and there were pretty darn tasty and most importantly – they were cheap.)

Before I began my radio career, I worked at the 7-Eleven on Franklin and Leith on the east side of Flint, Michigan from 1976-1980. I could write a couple of blogs about working at 7-Eleven, but right now I want to focus on something that they sold there that you can’t find today and that’s the “Big Wheel Ice Cream Sandwich”. While regular run-of-the-mill ice cream sandwiches sold for ten or fifteen cents – the “Big Wheel” was what is now called “a premium ice cream confection”. Back in the 70s – these babies sold for a whopping sixty-nine cents and they were worth every penny. Imagine if you will – rich premium vanilla ice cream sandwiched between two oatmeal cookies covered with chocolate ….delicious chocolate…not the crappy Eskimo pie kind of chocolate that broke off in pieces…and you had a Big Wheel. Occasionally, they would ship us a box or two of chocolate ice cream Big Wheels and they would sell out before you could blink an eye. If you visit a 7-Eleven store around you today the odds are pretty good that you will no longer find a Big Wheel in their ice cream case…because they just don’t make ‘em anymore.

(And speaking of ice cream sandwiches – the best ice cream sandwich ever made (which aren’t made anymore) were Sealtest Ice Cream Sandwiches. You couldn’t find these sandwiches everywhere – but I use to get my fix for them at Jack’s Trading Post on Franklin Street and Ryckman’s Pharmacy on Chevrolet Avenue and from the ice cream vending machines at the Capital and Palace Theaters in Flint.)

Long before Subway or Quino’s – there was K-Mart. Remember going to K-Mart or Kresge’s and taking home a bag of three submarine sandwiches for a buck – try finding a K-Mart today that even makes subs – and trust me – you won’t pay a buck for them. The Super K-Mart in Port Huron still has subs – but they’re something like two for five dollars, but they don’t taste anything like those three for a buck subs from our childhood. There was something about those Kresge/K-Mart subs – with the carefully measured ham, bologna, onion, lettuce and mustard on a bun that brings back pleasant memories. For a buck – you could grab three subs at Kresge and share them with your friends in one of the booths in their dining area as you planned the rest of your day downtown.

Here are a couple of other food observations: Remember when both Mounds and Almond Joy were both made of dark chocolate? Remember PDQ chocolate (and egg nog) milk crystals? Remember the Hot Sam’s pretzel stands in the Eastland and Genesee Valley Malls and free chocolate cake on your birthday at Bill Knapps? And remember when there were Ponderosa Steak Houses just about everywhere in the Flint area (there’s only one left in Flint) and the owner did his own television commercials surrounded by kids?

Well – that’s food for thought for today.

The Adventures of Juan Williams

2010-10-23T16:25:00.000-04:00

Hey Kids! Whatever you do this Halloween -- don't dress like a Muslim
around this man -- it makes him nervous and scared.

Dear Juan Williams – Enough already!

Unless you have been living under a rock this last past week – NPR radio commentator Juan Williams was fired because of something that he said about Muslims on Bill O’Reilly’s Fox television show.

You see, Bill O’Reilly appeared on “The View” recently to promote his new book “Pinheads and Patriots” and as they say, all hell broke loose and life in the free world has changed for all of those in Bill’s orbit. One of the first things that O’Reilly said on “The View” was that Muslims (not Muslim extremists) flew the planes into the World Trade Center on 9/11 which infuriated Whoopi Goldberg and Joy Behar enough to walk off the stage in protest. Minutes after that incident happened – it was replayed on every cable “news” outlet, local news broadcasts, the network nightly news, Entertainment Tonight, TMZ and who knows where else. The sad thing is – Whoopi Goldberg and Joy Behar walking off their own show isn’t news – its show business. The President signs a bill – Congress and the Senate vote to do nothing and then recess – The World has been proven to be flat – now that’s all news.

O’Reilly loves to push people’s buttons and that is exactly what he did on the View and the walk-out only fueled the O’Reilly ego and has given him something to talk about for who knows how long. I think that O’Reilly has asked just about every guest that he has had on since the View incident to give him their take on what happened. Dennis Miller chimed in. O’Reilly brought in ‘the body language’ expert for her take and then in comes Juan Williams.

When O’Reilly asks Juan Williams for his take on the View incident – Juan should have said nothing – because Juan is a news commentator and the View incident is not news – it’s show business – Bill was there promoting his book and he probably would have done a song and dance with the cast of the show if they’d asked him.

But Williams responds to O’Reilly’s “Muslim” view of 9/11 by saying, “I mean, look, Bill, I'm not a bigot. You know the kind of books I've written about the civil rights movement in this country. But when I get on the plane, I got to tell you, if I see people who are in Muslim garb and I think, you know, they are identifying themselves first and foremost as Muslims, I get worried. I get nervous.”

Oh, no, Juan, you didn’t say what you just said, did you? Any time you start out a sentence and say “I am not a (fill in the blank)” and continue on by saying the total opposite of what you said you aren’t – you have just stepped in shit and there’s no way out and this time Juan, your main employer National Public Radio said enough is enough. Commenting that you get nervous and worried when you see Muslims in full garb at an airport isn’t commenting on the news it’s admitting your racism to Fox News Channel’s biggest show business personality (not newsman) Bill O’Reilly.

I have been fired Juan and sometimes its not pleasant – but you are lucky that you have friends at Fox watching your back. Yup, leave it to Fox News to take what is essentially an employee/employer issue and turn it into a free speech campaign and vehicle to take government funding out of public broadcasting and you Juan are a willing pawn in the Fox News game (willing because you gladly accepted that $2 million dollar contract on Friday from them).

Juan Williams being fired by NPR is not a free speech issue. Juan Williams is free to talk about all of the fears that he has in life from people in Muslim garb to some poltergeist inhabiting his kitchen cupboards all that he wants, because he was fired because his employers felt he overstep the boundaries of that of a news commentator. I’m sure there are other news organizations that would have done the same thing that NPR did had they been put in the same situation – Fox News doesn’t feel that way – because as we all know – Fox News is a news organization much like I am a nutritionist.

From The McRib to Obama and Other Mid-Term Election Comments

2010-10-20T02:32:00.000-04:00

I'll take two of these and a bag o' fries

Where do I begin? Food or politics? Let’s go food.

If I heard the news on the television correctly today – there will be fast food junkies around the country with a smile on their face. McDonalds is going to be bringing back the McRib sandwich (nationwide) on November 2^nd – but for a limited time only.

The McRib sandwich is not a true rib sandwich. It’s some ground up pork concoction that they shape to resemble pork ribs – it’s fried and smothered in barbeque sauce with onions and pickles and will set you back 500 calories per sandwich. Each McRib also has 26 grams of fat (10 saturated) and a whopping 980 mg of sodium – it’s not exactly the sandwich for those watching their weight or concerned about eating healthy. Despite all of that – the McRib is damn tasty!

I know that the day that McDonalds posts that the McRib is back on their marquee sign – I’m going to be one of the first through the drive-thru line ordering me a couple of these bad boys and I’ll add a side of fries to the order just to help in the destruction of my arteries enjoying food that I shouldn’t be eating.

And speaking of ribs and fast food – has anyone noticed that the ribs that Burger King was selling earlier this year and disappeared off of their menu? These little rib bites were the real thing – with a bone and all – unlike McDonald’s McRib offering. The Burger King rib bites were tasty, but they didn’t drench them in sauce – you had to dip them in a little barbeque sauce container (similar to the dipping containers for ranch dressing and honey mustard that you get at other restaurants). I’m one of those rib connoisseurs that wants their ribs drenched in barbeque sauce – you dip fries in sauce not ribs – so that was one of my complaints about the Burger King rib bites….along with the price. The rib bites weren’t cheap and if you’re going to pay a premium price for ribs – you don’t go to Burger King to get them.

I will give a tip of my cap to Burger King for my favorite burger at the moment…the Burger King A-1 XT – one of the more filling burgers on the fast food menus today. If you’re hungry and you want to feel like you actually ate something after ordering from a fast food restaurant – then The Burger King A-1 XT with A1 steak sauce is for you.

Let’s talk a little politics – can the mid-term elections come any quicker? I don’t know how you feel – but I have had enough of the political ads on television and news stories about Christine O’Donnell. I’m not excited about having to go into the voting booth in a couple of weeks and vote for either of the yahoos running for Governor in Michigan because both of them suck (although I will say that republican Rick Snyder has one of those most irritating voices in politics).

I mentioned on my Facebook status recently that Delaware Republican candidate for US Senate Christine O’Donnell’s looks reminded me of someone. It too me a while to figure out who she reminded me of – but then it hit me – Christine O’Donnell looks like Sarah Palin’s favorite mainstream media newscaster, Katie Couric. Take a good look at her tonight on the news and see if you don’t agree with me.

One of the other races that I’m watching closely is the attorney general race in Michigan between Republican Bill Schuette and Democrat David Leyton. One of the reasons that I’m interested in this race is because David Leyton use to be my boss when he owned WTAC in Flint and was the first person ever to “let me go” because of budget cuts and a change in format at the station. I saw David about five years ago at a restaurant where I was having dinner with my family and Leyton looked like he didn’t know who in the hell I was (and I’m not an easy person to forget). I found it all kind of humorous, because I was one of the first people that he hired when he bought WTAC and I had worked with him in the past when he use to fill in for Dave Barber when he went on vacation. Do I want Leyton to win? Yeah – only because Bill Schuette is a dick and he and the Michigan Republican Party are running one of the dirtiest campaigns that I have ever seen in Michigan.

And – here’s a piece of news that surprised me. The web site “The Wrap” is reporting that President Obama will be a guest on “The Daily Show” with Jon Stewart on October 27^th (which is three days before Jon Stewart and Steven Colbert’s big rally in Washington, D.C.). I know that Stewart will be respectful of the President – but I also know that he isn’t shy to ask some tough questions to that man won the country over on a platform of hope and change – only to see that there’s been very little of either since he has taken office.

Tell Me It Ain't So -- Coney Island Tacos!!!

2010-10-17T02:27:00.000-04:00

Van (on right) and I at Angelo's on Dort Highway

My friend Van from

Georgia

recently paid a visit to Michigan recently and I was lucky enough to be able to spend an entire day with him in our old home town of Flint, Michigan. Since time was short, we combined two of the things that we loved to do into one – which is sitting down in front of two up and a side of fries from Angelo’s and playing a game of Scrabble.

Van and I take Scrabble pretty seriously. For the last eight years or so, a Friday night doesn’t go by where the both of us aren’t online taking each other on in a game of Scrabble. We connect to some Scrabble playing board located in

Romania

(I’m serious) and we use Yahoo or Google Talk for live audio chat to talk trash to each other as we play. His wife and my girlfriend both think that the both of us are nuts and neither Van or I will correct their opinion of us, because we know that despite our weirdness that they still love us.

The date was August 21, 2010. I drive over to Flint from the Port Huron area (where I now live) to pick up Van at the motel that he was staying on Hill Road in Grand Blanc. We were both hungry for coneys and Scrabble and I decided that the best place to play and eat would be at Angelo’s Dort Hwy location – not only because the place isn’t as busy as the Franklin and Davison location – but this Angelo’s is located in the old Wendy’s restaurant location (next to where Ember’s use to be) and we had spent many hours soaking up alcohol there in the early 80s.

You might think that people might say something to you or give you an odd look or two when two normal looking guys sit down in a coney island restaurant and set a Scrabble board before the drinks and menus are brought to the table – you might think it – but nothing whatsoever happened. No stares, no comments, no nothing. As a matter of fact, our waitress was nice enough to take a picture of the both of us playing and enjoying our coneys and who said the people in Flint aren’t friendly. Hahaha!

To make a long story short – I am proud to say that I won what we titled “The Flint Angelo’s Scrabble Challenge” by a score of 348 to 283. I should have taken a picture of the winning board – but it totally escaped me.

What didn’t escape Van or I was something that we saw posted on a sign at Angelo’s. Angelo’s was introducing a new menu item and Van and I took it as a slap the Flint coney dog and something that we felt embarrassed that Angelo’s would stoop to doing just to sell a few more dogs. The item that they were selling: ‘HARD SHELL CONEYS” – which is nothing more than coney island tacos. What the…..

If you were born and bred in Flint, Michigan – there is one thing that we could always be proud of and that’s Koegel hot dogs. Koegel hot dogs aren’t your every day hot dog made with animal parts that you wouldn’t even feed to your pet. Koegel’s were (and still are) made with some pretty high standards and anyone who has ever eaten a Koegel coney longs to hear and feel that snap of the dog when you bite into it. It’s that snap and the high quality that we have come to expect in a coney – but now Angelo’s (of all places) is cheapening the coney experience by turning it into a taco.

I have had arguments with coney island cooks in the Port Huron area about the Flint coney versus the Detroit style coney. I don’t care what these slap-happy grease pushers say --- the Flint coney is a better hot dog and I’m sure that there are other people out there who feel the same way that I do, but it just saddens me that Angelo’s has now turned the coney into a taco. What’s next coney pizza? Coney Subs? Coney sushi? Coney on a stick?

If you love coneys like I love coneys….I urge you to say no to the Hard Shell Coney at Angelo’s, After all that Flint has gone through as a city – the last thing we need is to see Angelo’s make a mockery of our beloved coney island.

And with that said…if you see my waitress…tell her that I could use another coney and a side of fries with gravy.

American Idol New Judges, A Freddie Mercury Bio-Pic and What's Jon Stewart Doing?

2010-09-18T01:37:00.001-04:00

American Idol Scheduled To Idle Up The Judges Bench

Mark your calendars -- Wednesday, September 22 – is the date when Fox Broadcasting and the producers of “American Idol” will finally and officially announce who will be filling the judge’s chairs on the upcoming season of the most popular show in America today. The safe bet is that the new judges will be Arrowsmith’s lead singer Steven Tyler and actress/singer Jennifer Lopez, but they just might throw a curve ball and announce someone who know one knew of or someone not even on the list of prospective judges -- it could happen -- but mostly likely won’t.

Once the names of the new judges are announced – the next big question is how they might affect the show and will the audience feel comfortable with their choices. Who knows how to addition of Tyler and Lopez will be to the show and what they can add to mix. Personally, I’m comfortable with someone like Jennifer Lopez as a judge -- she’s actually someone who has had a hit record or two in this decade and can really give some input to the contestants on the show, but Tyler is another story.

In my opinion, Steven Tyler is too much of a rock n’ roll icon to muck it up as a judge on a televised singing competition every week. I can just imagine some contestant from some small farm town in Iowa belting out another lame version of Neil Diamond classic and Tyler -- who sings songs like “Love In A Elevator” and “Jenny’s Got A Gun” having to give this contestant some constructive criticism – it just doesn’t feel right to me. I’m sure he’s capable of giving this person some criticism, but just appearing on this show as a judge has got to do some serious damage to his rock n’ roll credibility in the future. Is it really worth destroying your rock n’ roll icon status just to get a weekly check from a television program?

Bohemian Borat

Robert DeNiro’s Tribecta company is part of the production team that will be putting the life of Queen’s rock n’ roll frontman, Freddie Mercury, on the silver screen soon and you will never believe you they have hired to protray him. Sacha Baron Cohen. If his nsame doesn’t ring a bell – maybe the names of two of the characters that he has protrayed on film will – Borat and Bruno.

The production company has secured the rights to the music of Queen and members of the band will be participating in the production – what is not known right now is whether or not they will be using the actual recording of Freddie Mercury in the soundtrack.

Mercury, along with Queen, were responsible for a string of hits – such as “Bohemian Rhapsody”, “We Will Rock You/We Are The Champions”, “Radio Goo-Goo”, and “Best Friend”.

Mercury died in 1985 of complications from AIDS.

On a personal note – I got to see Queen perform at the Civic Center in Saginaw, Michigan in the late 70s. Believe it or not – they were the opening act for Bob Seger and it was one of those concerts where the opening act made you forget who the headliner of the show was and one of the reasons for that was the showmanship of Freddie Mercury – who with some fancy trickery from the people working the sound board – allowed Mercury to harmonize with himself on “Bohemian Rhaposdy”. I have seldom been blown away by a live performance like I was that night at the Saginaw Civc Center.

What A Difference A Year Makes

The new television season has begun and the ratings are slowly begining to trickle in. This Tuesday was the season premiere of my favorite show “Parenthood” and with it’s premiere comes some good and bad news. The good news is that they won the 10pm time period – the bad news is that their ratings were down from last season and even 17% down from Jay Leno’s first Tuesday night in the 10pm time slot last year.

And...then there’s the story of Donald Trump and the new season of “The Apprentice” – filled with real people who have no job fighting to be hired to be Donald Trump’s apprentice. Airing against repeats on the other networks – the two hour premiere episode was the lowest rated episode of “The Apprentice” ever – with the ratings 53% down from the last celebrity edision of the show and 63% down from the last time that “The Donald” did a non-celebrity verison of the program. To add insult to injury – Thursday night’s premiere of “The Apprentice” was down 44% from the Thursday debut of the Jay Leno Show at 10 last season.

And here’s more ratings news. This week Jay Leno’s ratings were the highest that they have been since he has returned to the 11:35pm time slot. I don’t know the ratings breakdown in age – but I do know that he is attracting an older audience that what Conan was getting.

And a couple of more things before I leave....

If you are one of those people who wondered when the NFL would hire an act for the Super Bowl half-time show that has had a hit in the last decade – you can quit wondering. After a string of evergreen rock n’ roll acts – the NFL has hired Black Eyes Peas as the half-time entertainment for the 2011 Super Bowl.

Fans of Jon Stewart and “The Daily Show” – mark this date in your calendar – September 22, 2010. On that date – Jon Stewart will enter the “no spin zone” of Bill O’Reilly to promote “Earth (The Book)” written by Stewart and the writing staff of “The Daily Show”. O’Reilly will return Stewart’s visit to his Fox show by appearing on “The Daily Show” on September 27th. I don’t know if Stewart will be able to convince Papa Bear Bill O’Reilly to make an appearance at the Daily Show’s upcoming “Rally To Restore Sanity” in Washington, D.C. on October 30th..

Cider and Doughnuts -- It's Autumn In Michigan

2010-09-11T02:57:00.002-04:00

(Photo courtesy of www.michiganapples.com)

It’s getting to be that time in Michigan. The leaves on the trees are changing colors and it’s cool enough to turn off the central air and open the windows and let Mother Nature keep you cool with her cool summer breeze. After a summer what seemed like non-stop ninety to ninety-five degree heat and humidity – these cool temperatures are a welcome relief and something of a reward from having to endure all that we had to this the summer.

The cool temperatures aren’t the only reward that us Michigan folks get to enjoy right around this time every year and just thinking about it is enough to put a smile on your face. What am I talking about? It’s apple harvest time and there’s nothing like popping the wife and kids into the family sedan and going to an apple orchard for a gallon of freshly squeezed apply cider and a dozen or so of those apple cinnamon doughnuts with the sprinkled sugar that are greasy as all get out – but worth every delicious bite of them that you take.

The big box stores – Meijer, Wal-Mart and Kroger – try to capitalize on this time of year by offering apple cider and apple doughnuts from their bakery – but it’s just not the same. For one thing – the apple cider that they usually offer has been pasteurized and distilled enough that by the time that they put it in the plastic gallon – you’d better off just going down their frozen food aisle and grabbing a can of frozen concentrated apple juice. If you want really true apple cider – you have got to go to an apple orchard – there are no cutting corners here. And the apple cider doughnuts at the big box stores are same league as the jelly filled pastries that they masquerade as paczkis right before Fat Tuesday --- they’re about as close as Kool-Aid is to Coca-Cola…it might be tasty, but it’s not the real thing.

I’m a little choosy when it comes to apple orchards, too. There are about six or so apple orchards in the area where I now live in Michigan and they are as varied as a Wal-Mart store is to some Mom and Pop grocery store or as Cedar Point is to a traveling amusement company. When it comes to orchards – I prefer the orchard that is close to a Mom and Pop/fruit stand – farmer’s market kind of operation. All you need is an area where there’s delicious apple cider that they squeeze and keep cold in a big cooler and they have got to have those apple cider doughnuts – fried before your eyes and served hot with a tall Styrofoam cup filled with cider. If all the orchard has is just apples, apple cider and doughnuts – I’m there – looking for seconds and thirds.

There’s one apple orchard in this area that tries too damn hard. They have classed the joint up to become a tourist destination for people visiting the area and when you class something up – you can expect to pay big ticket prices, too. I go to an apple orchard for apple cider and donuts – I don’t go there for little knick-knacks and the kind of candy and trinkets that you can find a Cracker Barrel. Give me cider, damn it!

When my Mother was alive – I took her to this “fancy” apple orchard thinking that she might enjoy it, boy was I wrong. When she came face-to-face with a caramel apple that was priced at nearly two bucks (and this was something like ten years ago), my Mom said, “I wouldn’t pay two dollars and I won’t let you pay two dollars for a god-damn caramel apple,” I knew then and there that the fruit doesn’t fall far from the tree between my Mother and me when it comes to how we choose our apple orchards.

Most of my life I have lived in an urban area and I never thought that I would ever find myself living, as well as enjoying, life in a rural setting and it was about six or seven years ago that I knew that I have finally adjusted to living in a rural area – and it took an apple orchard in the area to make me realize that I had made the change. An out of town friend of mine was visiting his sister in the area and I had him follow me to one of the apple orchards in the area. After enjoying some cider and doughnuts, he needed directions on how to get back to Detroit and I surprised myself that I actually knew how he could hook up to M-25 and the freeway back home – because I had only been to this orchard once or twice myself – and I’m usually not that great with directions. But, when I could tell him how to get back to Detroit from this orchard – I realized that I was finally comfortable with my new rural lifestyle.

Well, I should be going and don’t be surprised if you see me enjoying a nice tall glass of apple cider over the next few weekends….because it’s that time of year in Michigan....let’s enjoy it while we can.

It's Only TV: The Return of "Parenthood" on NBC and CNN Decides To Dumb Down After King's Departure

2010-09-09T02:07:00.000-04:00

(The cast of "Parenthood")

DVR Alert!!!

This Saturday, if a bunch of yahoos aren’t burning copies of the Koran and pissing off Muslims around the world in the dumbest excuse to fight terrorism, I invite you to gather ‘round your television set for two hours of just plain good television. NBC, in an effort to get more eyes to tune in to the season premiere on Tuesday, will be rerunning (or as they say, providing an “encore” showing) of two episodes from last season’s marginal Tuesday night hit “Parenthood”.

There are very few television shows that I would get on a soapbox to praise and “Parenthood” is that rare show. It’s amazing that I even like this show as much as I do, because it comes from Ron Howard’s Imagine company which can really pump out some bland movies and television shows – but “Parenthood” clicked with me the moment that I started to watch it.

Is “Parenthood” great TV? Far from it – but it’s enjoyable television – and it’s one of those shows that you hate to see come to an end every week.

“Parenthood” is basically a story of the Braverman family – who are far from being the perfect family – but they have enough going for them that you want to be a part of their family and share all of the heartaches, triumphs and accomplishments. And as you watch the show, you just wish that your family was as cool as the Bravermans.

The only bad thing about “Parenthood” is that it is directly opposite of “The Good Wife” on CBS at 10pm on Tuesday nights. If you don’t own a DVR – these two shows are enough to entice you to get off your ass and get one hooked up in your home. Good TV on network television doesn’t come along often – so you have to be prepared to capture it when ever you can – because if you don’t – all you’re going to get is more shitty reality programming.

It’s official Piers Morgan is coming to CNN

(CNN Founder Ted Turner)

Ted Turner has got to be a little frustrated with some of the recent news coming out of the all news network that he created and sold to Time/Life. The management at CNN can’t do anything right and are being slapped about mightily in ratings by Rupert Murdoch’s Fox News.

When Campbell Brown announced that she was leaving CNN – who did CNN hire to replace her 8pm news program? CNN is pairing former New York Governor Elliot Spitzer, who resigned from elected office after news came out about how much he enjoyed “the whores”, and conservative columnist Kathleen Parker in an hour chat-fest similar to the old “Crossfire” debates CNN once aired. Maybe Spitzer can work up a Dan Ackroyd impression from the old SNL sketches with Jane Curtan and respond to something Ms Parker said by saying, “Kathleen, you ignorant slut.” If he did that – the show might be interesting to watch – but trust me – when this show debuts on CNN later this summer you’re going to be searching for a channel on your TV that’s airing a freshly painted wall drying.

And CNN has officially announced the worse kept secret in broadcasting – they have hired British TV personality/journalist Piers Morgan to replace Larry King come January. Most people in this country are familiar with Morgan from his appearances on “Celebrity Apprentice” and as one of the judges on “

America

’s Got Talent” and he doesn’t exactly have one of the warmest personalities on television. He can be arrogant , pushy and somewhat rude and I am of the opinion that Morgan will do or say something on the CNN show that will tarnish CNN’s image as a legitimate news outlet.

This one has me scratchin’ my head

I have a lot of respect for TNT and their programming choices. I love “The Closer” and “Saving Grace” was one of my all-time favorite shows. Ray Romano’s TNT show “Men Of A Certain Age” (due to return to TNT in November) is television at its finest – so why in the hell would they order up a pilot for a remake of the old TV show “Dallas” – a show that hasn’t been on the air in nearly twenty years. The CW network has learned the hard way that you can’t capture lightening in a bottle twice with their remake of “90210”…what makes TNT think that a remake of “Dallas” is going to set the world on fire?

Well…that’s going to do it for now…until we meet again.....hand me the remote and remember – It’s Only TV.

I Remember: One Of The Loneliest Nights In My Life -- My Junior High School Prom

2010-09-07T02:09:00.000-04:00

I remember….one of the loneliest night of my life…my ninth grade prom at Lowell Jr. High on the east side of Flint, Michigan.

I had a crush on a girl in junior high and I would have done anything to get this girl’s attention – but I don’t think she even knew I existed. It might have helped if I hadn’t been so damn shy, but when your parents split up and your Mother remarries only to get another divorce and you live in five different houses – all in the span of some six years – shyness becomes the only defense you have to avoid getting hurt.

I really never got involved in anything at school – because the way things were going – who knew how long I would be attending that school…that’s why I really didn’t have any friends until my high school years. Sometime I felt like I was just “passing through” during those elementary and junior high school years and there was no need to me to get involved in anything that would make me feel like I was putting down some kind of roots….that was until the junior high school prom.

Her name was Barbara and not only was she cute, but she was also smart and one of the more popular girls in school. At lunch time, Barbara was not at a loss for friends at her table in the cafeteria – where as I was usually the kid sitting alone with his carton of white milk that actually enjoyed the meatloaf that the cafeteria ladies slapped on your tray once a week. I would admire Barbara from a distance day dreaming that she might actually like me and that guys would be envious of me because of Barbara “liking me”….but as I said….she didn’t even know that I existed.

I thought that I might finally have my “in” in trying to get to know Barbara when it was announced that a committee was being formed to organize the 9^th grade prom. I knew that Barbara was going to be involved in the prom, so I thought that I would throw my hat into the ring and do something to make the prom a big success, so I signed up and attended a meeting of the prom committee one night after school. Why I should get involved in something like this was beyond me – here I was – a guy who never went to any of the junior high school dances during all my junior high years now getting involved in the prom – what was I thinking? Hell…I can’t even dance!

While everybody on the prom committee decided on a theme and what they could do for decorations – I told them that I would work on publicity for the event – but not the normal type of publicity (crappy water colored painted posters posted throughout the school); I was going to take publicity for the junior high school prom to a new level….commercials (little did I know that writing commercials for radio stations would become my career when I got older). I told them I would write the commercials….we could record them on one of the school’s 3M Wollensak reel-to-reel recorders and the principle could play a commercial every day during the morning p.a. announcements. Everyone thought it was a great idea and they told me to go ahead and do it….and that’s just what I did.

I don’t remember exactly how many commercials I wrote and recorded – but I can remember producing the commercials one night after school in the same English classroom where I would read my copy of the Detroit Free Press while everyone else was reading “The Odyssey of Homer”. The scripts for the prom commercials required some acting and the odds are pretty damn good that they were terrible – but it was junior high school – and the only reason that I was doing this anyway was to try and put the spotlight on myself and get Barbara to notice me. Did it work? Nope.

I was as invisible to Barbara on the night of the prom as I was before the prom. I can remember my Mom buying me a brand new yellow banlon turtle neck shirt at K-Mart to wear to the prom and this chain with flat diamond shaped pieces of brown wood that my Mom actually thought was “love beads”. In my Mom’s eyes – I was going to drive the girls’ wild at this prom – little did she know.

When I got to the prom – a couple of people made some comments about the “love beads” – which gave me a good reason to take them off and put them in my pocket – and that’s about the only thing anybody ever said to me that night. While most of the people were dancing on the dance floor or playing bumper pool in the room off of the gym, I was either walking around the gym or sitting in the bleachers watching everything going on around me. Barbara was there, as popular as ever, and when they weren’t praising her for how great the prom was she was dancing with a guy, who I later found out was her boyfriend.

I left the prom early that night. The girl who I liked didn’t even know I existed despite all that I did to get her attention…plus…I can’t dance and was too shy to ask anyone to dance with me if I did, so I left. I couldn’t go right home, because then I would have to answer all of the questions that my Mom would have about the prom and I couldn’t tell her the truth. So, I walked around the softball fields that the junior high school shared with the elementary school – occasionally sitting on one of the benches near the softball diamonds and just stared at the stars in the sky

There it was – my junior high school prom – (one of) the loneliest nights in my life.

Labor Day Means A Lot of Things: Jerry Lewis, TV Guide and The New Fall TV Season

2010-09-04T00:00:00.002-04:00

When I was growing up on the East side of Flint, Michigan – Labor Day weekend meant three things and none of them were associated with the real reason for Labor Day. Labor Day weekend signaled the end of summer and that meant having to go back to school and all of the “fun” associated with that.

Labor Day weekend also meant having to endure another Jerry Lewis Labor Day telethon – but back then there were actually real stars performing on the telethon. It’s hard to get all excited about the Jerry Lewis telethon today when the talent is on par with a junior high school talent show – plus – anyone and everyone who watches the show today wonders how many more of these things Jerry can do before he takes the big dirt nap. Hell, he’s barely on the show very much as it is – a few hour in the beginning…an hour or so in the middle….and an hour or so at the end. (He’s got to be there at the end so we can see if he really blubbers it up during his rendition of “You Never Walk Alone”) And let’s be honest with ourselves – is it really any fun watching the telethon these days without hearing Ed McMahon announcing some new numbers on the tote board?

And when I was growing up, the Labor Day weekend also signaled the beginning of a new television season and the most anticipated magazine of the year (before Sports Illustrated’s swimsuit issue and puberty arrived in my life) was TV Guide’s New Television Season Preview Guide. The preview guide issues of TV Guide were the biggest issues of the year with synopsis of all of the new shows and pictures of all of the stars appearing in them and if you loved TV Guide – this was the issue that you were waiting for all year long.

The Summer Preview Issue also gave you your first look at what the local television stations in your area had planned for their viewers – such as what new syndicated shows they purchased and how they scheduled them. I mean, when you’re a kid – nothing pisses you off more than to discover that your favorite show was no longer on the schedule of your local TV station --- “How dare they cancel ‘Star Trek’ reruns so that they can show Dinah Shore’s talk show in the afternoon! Those bastards!!!”

If you only read TV Guide once a year – the old Summer Season Preview Issue was the issue to read and to imagine all of the information was compiled all together in one magazine that you could buy at your corner grocery store for fifteen cents! What a bargain! The Guide itself, in its digest-size was a thing of beauty – with its glossy pages filled with stories about TV and TV personalities and then there was the listings section with the black or white TV channel numbers, TV show title, type of program and program length….now that was TV Guide. When they switched to using a grid to show the evening’s television schedule is when TV Guide lost me and then they switched the format to make TV Guide look more like a magazine and they have jacked the price up to $3.99 an issue…what are they thinking!?

And much like TV Guide is a thing of the past – there was more news coming out concerning television, or should I say, the video industry that’s kind of sad. It won’t be too much longer before Blockbuster video stores become a thing of the past with the announcement that they are going to be closing about eight hundred more stores as they reorganize their one billion dollar debt.

In all of the years that Blockbuster video has been open – I probably rented one movie from them and I think that I bought one of their used previewed movies. It’s not that I didn’t like Blockbuster, but I was a bit loyal to my friend, the late Jack Hood, who owned Rainbow Video in Flint. I think it would be safe to say that Jack Hood owned one of the first video stores in the Flint area and one of the reasons that it was one of the best places to go to rent a movie was because Jack and co-owner Gene Krusewski loved the movies. When you went to Blockbuster or any one of the other chain video stores – the people behind the counter were interchangeable from the local McDonalds with kids working there just to make a buck and they could care less about the movies. Jack and Gene appreciated their customers and loved talking about the movies and were able to turn that love into a business. But the type of store that they operated has become a thing of the past – much in the same way Blockbuster will be in the months ahead – victim to cable TV pay-per-view, the dollar video kiosks, Netflix and video downloads from your home computer.

Dumb TV Alert:

I can watch some pretty dumb shit on TV and feel no remorse about it – but there is one level of dumb TV that I will not lower myself to and that’s having to watch “Dancing With The Stars”. The producers of this show could resurrect Jesus Christ and have him compete on “Dancing With The Stars” and I will not watch it. For one thing – it’s ballroom dancing…and the other thing…who in the hell are they fooling – some of the stars on this show would have a hard time convincing people in their own homes of their star status. and what does it say about your star status if they do choose you to be on this show.

The producers of DWTS announced who the stars that will be competing in this season’s show and what a list:

Singer Michael Bolton (I don’t think he could sell one of his CDs today on QVC – which should give you some indication of how his career has been going)
Former LA Laker forward Rick Fox
Comedian Margaret Cho (who is in the cast of Lifetime’s “Drop Dead Diva”)
Florence Henderson of “The Brady Bunch” fame and has been hosting a senior citizens talk show on one of the cable networks.
Jennifer Grey (who played “Baby” in “Dirty Dancing” and who’s career has been pretty much off the radar ever since she had a nose job)
“The Situation” from MTV’s “Jersey Shore”

But the “star” that really caught all of the attention was none other that Sarah Palin’s daughter Bristol (named after the city where ESPN is located in Connecticut). What is this kid’s claim to fame? She’s Sarah Palin’s kid…you remember…the one who got knocked up and was going to marry the father, but decided against it…and then they got back together again…announced that they were going to get married….and decided against it again. And you have Bristol trying to be the poster child to tell all young girls about not having sex before marriage and how rough it is to be an unwed mother…blah blah blah. Yup, this was the kid whose mother chastised Barack Obama for being a part of the “celebrity culture”…yet it sure does look like she and her Mama are profiting pretty well from it. I hear a season of being a star on DWTS is worth something like $250,000 and Mama Palin doesn’t open her mouth unless she’s paid for it.

I have rambled enough…I think I’ll just wrap this thing up. Enjoy the Labor Day weekend and until we meet again…remember…it’s only TV.

TV Frostbites: Changes Ahead For American Idol

2010-07-28T00:38:00.002-04:00

It’s not been a good year for “American Idol”. First – the contract for Paula Abdul, one of Idol’s original trio of judges wasn’t renewed, so the producers had to scramble to find another person to fill her chair on the panel. . Who did they get to replace Abdul – none other than daytime talk show host and comedian Ellen Degeneres and even that announcement was overshadowed with Simon Cowell announcing that this would be his last season of Idol.

Another problem that Idol had this past year is with the talent that they people had to choose and vote on. The talent on this year’s Idol was less than stellar – which could be the reason why the ratings for the show were down and lack of ticket sales have caused the cancellation of some of the dates on this summer’s “Idols On Tour” show.

Fox can see the writing on the wall and they’re going to do everything in their power to save this show – one of the few network television shows that can guarantee audiences of 15-20 million each and every week.

The Hollywood Reporter is reporting this week that Fox is close to bringing in Nigel Lythgoe, who along with Simon Fuller, created the world-wide Idol franchise and who was one of American Idol’s producers for the show’s first seven season. You can bet the house that if Lythgoe does return to Idol you can expect a lot of changes.

One of the changes could be seeing the show going back to a three person judging panel. Lythgoe was not a big fan of the addition of a fourth judge, because he felt that it took the focus off the contestants.

And there could be changes to the judging panel. Only two of current judges have a contract – Randy Jackson and Ellen Degeneres. Jackson is on the final year of his contract and Degeneres has a multi-year contract; and they have yet to sign Kara DioGuardi (who has a one year at a time contract arrangement). If Lythgoe has his way – the only judge to be safe on the panel is Randy Jackson.

Who would Lythgoe bring in to take Simon Cowell’s place on American Idol? He has a pretty strong wish list and any of the names – such as Sir Elton John, Justin Timberlake, Harry Conick, Jr., Usher and Chris Issak – would be a welcome addition to the show. He has even mentioned that he wouldn’t mind seeing Paula Abdul come back to the show – but that might be a little difficult now that she has her own show coming up on CBS.

Since this original post -- a few things have happened in the land of American Idol. Thursday, July 29th -- Ellen Degeneres announced that she is leaving the show after just one season. She explained her reasons in this press release:

"A couple months ago, I let Fox and the 'American Idol' producers know that this didn't feel like the right fit for me. I told them I wouldn't leave them in a bind and that I would hold off on doing anything until they were able to figure out where they wanted to take the panel next. It was a difficult decision to make, but my work schedule became more than I bargained for. I also realized this season that while I love discovering, supporting and nurturing young talent, it was hard for me to judge people and sometimes hurt their feelings. I loved the experience working on 'Idol' and I am very grateful for the year I had. I am a huge fan of the show and will continue to be."

Also, representatives from Sir Elton John and Justin Timerlake have announced that they will not be part of the new judges panel on American Idol when it debuts later this year.

In other TV news:

CBS is doing something nice to brighten up the summer TV doldrums – they are rerunning their surprise reality hit show – “Uncover Boss” -- every Sunday night from 9 to 10pm. This is the show where the CEO of some pretty famous companies, such as Roto-Rotor, Waste Management, 1-800-Flowers, and more, go undercover to things really are with their companies. In the end, the CEO lets everyone know who he really is and they institute some of the ideas the workers of the company mentioned to the “Uncover Boss”. This Sunday – the Uncover Boss is from Hooters.

He's Coming Home....For A Visit, That Is

2010-07-26T00:48:00.000-04:00

A photo of Van and Rich taken during Van's last visit to Flint

I can see it now.

He’s counting down the days.

I wouldn’t be surprised if he has a calendar set up at his home in Macon, Georgia and he’s using a big black Magic Marker © to mark the days off.

30 days. 29 days. 28 days. 27 days. 26 days. 25 days. 24 days. 23 days. 22 days. 3 more weeks!

After some seven years, my buddy Van VanDeWalker is going to be visiting his hometown of Flint, Michigan and to say that he’s excited about this visit would be the understatement of the century. He’s pumped! If you could put anticipation for a trip on steroids – Van would make Barry Bonds look like a piker when it came to being “juiced”!

No longer does Van have to settle for reliving the memories of biting down and hearing the snap of a Koegel Vienna with Angelo’s coney island sauce, mustard and onions…he’s going to be able to enjoy one, two, maybe three.

Van can attest to the fact that not only does seven days without a Halo Burger make one week – imagine seven years between a Bill Thomas olive Halo burger. Knowing Van he’ll probably tell you that having to live all those years without a Bill Thomas Halo burger was a living hell – something akin to being water boarded by Dick Cheney.

The anticipation for this trip is high…really high…and it makes sane men do strange things. If I were a betting man, I’d place a few bucks on one of the first things that Van does when he gets off the plane at Bishop Airport is to kiss the ground. Yup, he’ll get down on his knees and kiss the tarmac and hope like hell that airport security doesn’t bitch slap him. I’m sure that before Van leaves the airport in his cheapest you can find but still expensive rent-a-car, he will buy a Flint Journal from one of the airport coin boxes to read back in his motel room. And, if I know Van, he’ll be sneaking a peek at a headline here and there while waiting for the traffic lights to change on the way to his budget motel.

One of the reasons that Van will be visiting Flint will be to attend a high school class reunion, but one day of his three day visit will be taken up by doing one thing – joining me for a tour of the old town and seeing first hand just how much things have changed.

Whether it was going to Kearsley Park on a hot summer day to learn basic lessons of safety at Safetyville,

USA

or taking in a Thanksgiving Day Northern/Central game at Atwood Stadium on a cold winter day – that’s the Flint that will forever be a part of a lot of us. Or maybe it was jumping on an MTA bus and meeting all our friends downtown to see a movie at the Palace or Capitol Theater, or enjoying a ice cream sundae in the restaurant at Smith B’s or a bag of caramel popcorn from Dales. There are so many moments and places that both Van and I are going to relive as we drive around Flint and remembering how it use to be.

When we drive by Windmill Place – I’m sure we’ll have a laugh remembering when that Saturday a long long time ago when I participated in a “Celebrity Hot Dog Eating Contest”. The organizers of this even pitted me against some small bellied “celebrities” from WTRX, Channel 5 and some other media organization that I can’t remember and they didn’t have a chance against my hot dog eating skills – me, the well-trained eating machine. These guys were no match and I didn’t even have to pull out all of the stops to trounce the competition. .

Van will be surprised as I take him to one of the new sub-divisions in Grand Blanc and remind him that the radio station that we once worked for – WTAC – once stood where these beautiful homes now stand. I’m sure he’ll also be surprised by all of the changes on S. Saginaw in Grand Blanc….this wasn’t the way he remembered the way it looked.

Van will also be surprised when I point out to him that the “Jumbo Video” store on Dort Hwy., across from K-Mart, is where the Ember’s Lounge once stood. It was at the Ember’s Lounge where all of his friends left him alone on the dance floor to do a drunken Pee Wee Herman dance as we enjoyed our drinks and watched him from our table.

Our sight-seeing trip to Flint wouldn’t be complete without checking out the Citizens Bank weather ball or driving by that forty foot waitress in front of at the coney island restaurant on Corunna Road. For old times sake – we’ll probably buy a lottery ticket or two at Paul’s Pipe Shop and see first hand all of the improvements downtown from the Durant Hotel to Channel 5’s new Flint headquarters to the new grocery store that just opened. We’ll probably visit the old neighborhoods and share stories about what made living there so great and as we’ll probably pay a visit to Gracelawn to honor family members who have left us that made these memories we’ll share possible.

So, join us in counting down the days. August 20-23, 2010 – Van VanDeWalker visits Flint. Believe it or not – on August 21^st – Van and I are going to combine two of our loves into one thing….coney islands and Scrabble. So, don’t be surprised if you see two guys chowing down the dogs at Angelo’s while they’re playing a game of Scrabble. You’re more than welcome to watch – but please – no helping the participants.

Some News About The News And The People Who Report It

2010-07-23T22:09:00.000-04:00

It’s been an interesting week in television. If rumors are any indication of anything – there will be one less female anchor hosting a network newscast in the not too distant future. There have been rumors this past week – although no official confirmation – that CBS would like to buy out the remainder of Katie Couric’s contract with CBS News and replace her as anchor. Would it surprise me if something like that happened? Not really – especially with all of the rumors swirling around the internet and news blogs of some sort of deal being worked out to combine CBS News and CNN. The other question is – who would CBS hire to fill the anchor chair if something like that did happen? I dunno! Maybe the news and entertainment division could work up a new program and call it something like “Who Will Be The Next CBS Evening News Anchor?” and have a bunch of reporters competing against each other for the position. You could even have CBS/Viacom’s Chairman Sumner Redstone in the boardroom telling one reporter each week that they can “turn in your reporter’s notebook and go home’.

Along with the talk of CBS wanting to buy out Katie Couric’s contract is the report that NBC’s Jeff Zucker (the man responsible for Jay Leno at 10) would like to have Katie Couric back home on NBC’s “Today Show”. C’mon Jeff – do you really think that Katie is going to come back and be the perky one on the “Today Show” with Matt and Al after she has being the evening news anchor at CBS? Jeff – Katie coming back to the “Today Show” wouldn’t exactly be a forward career move – that’s unless you have another brilliant idea – maybe something like “Today At Night” – a prime time hour of news and information and can use every Monday through Friday at 10pm. Jeff Zucker could try and convince the affiliates on how cost effective a move having the “Today Show” on at night would be. It would be less expensive that those pesky hour long dramas that you have to buy and schedule and what’s a more perfect lead-in to the late night local news that a network newscast. Katie could report the news and do those hard-hitting interviews (like asking Sarah Palin what she reads) and the premiere show could feature one of Katie’s always entertaining colostomies. Hell…maybe Zucker could be the one that the person that Katie chooses to insert a camera to go where cameras aren’t meant to go. I know it all sounds pretty far-fetched – but nothing is impossible or far-fetched in the TV news business these days.

When I say noting is impossible or far-fetched in the TV news business these days – all you have to do is look at what’s happening at CNN. Once known as the most trusted name in news -- CNN is quickly becoming the most desperate cable channel in America today. When Campbell Brown resigned, CNN finally came to the realization that they couldn’t compete against the other channels with news and nothing but the news. So, what does CNN do? They are about to combine the news that you need to know with the equivalent of the kind of theater you’d expect to see on a prime time wrestling show. If a bell is going off in your head that it sounds vaguely like “Crossfire”— the old CNN show where they pitted a liberal against a conservative and let them go at it – then you get a gold star for your forehead for having a good memory. But they don’t stop there…the hosts that they have hired for this new program will be conservative columnist Kathleen Parker and Eliot Spitzer, who was once the governor of New York until news came out that he like to hire hookers. Don’t expect a lot of respectable polite political discussions on this show – be prepared for a lot of shouting and attention getting theatrics or, in other words, a reason for you to tune in to CNN instead of the other cable “news” networks.

And the hits don’t stop there – CNN is looking to replace Larry King – who’s turning in his suspenders after twenty-five years of softball questions to some of the most powerful people in the world. It’s pretty much a forgone conclusion that CNN will hire British TV personality and hack journalist Piers Morgan to fill the 9pm slot. Most Americans know Piers from the Simon Cowell produced “America’s Got Talent” and from his appearance on “Celebrity Apprentice”. Hiring Morgan will be the dumbest thing that CNN has ever done. Trust me – before six months time – Piers Morgan will do something and say something to embarrass the network and give CNN critics fuel to burn the whole house down. Piers Morgan is an ass and there’s no way in hell that he should be allowed to do an interview with a serious newsmaker – if my memory serves me right – Morgan once asked a British Prime Minister if he and his wife are members of the “mile high club”. So, brace yourself for CNN’s new prime time line-up of Parker and Spitzer followed by Piers (I know Sharon Osborne) Morgan. It’s a line-up like that that might have Anderson Cooper seriously consider taking the evening news spot on CBS.

Once a Flaming Talk Show Host -- The Only Flame Now in Dave Barber's Life is on his Grill and He's Happy About That

2010-07-09T23:08:00.000-04:00

It wasn’t that long ago that the radio market in Flint, Michigan was filled with some incredible on-air personalities from wild and kinetic rock n’ roll antics of Peter C. Cavanaugh on WTAC to the mid-day housewife’s best friend, Betty Clark on WFDF. Country music fans listening to WKMF couldn’t get enough of disc-jockeys such as Johnny Irons and Big Bill Anderson and then there was Buffalo Dick’s Radio Ranch on WWCK – Jeff Lamb’s somewhat bent take on children’s television shows that kept everyone entertained in the late 70s.

It’s a pretty safe bet that if there was anyone on the radio in Flint, Michigan who made a lasting impression on people – good or bad – that person would be Dave Barber. While working overnights spinning records at WTRX – Dave dipped his toes into the world of talk radio by filling in for a vacationing Wally Kennedy. Unlike other fill-in hosts for Wally Kennedy – Dave didn’t play it safe – he instantly went into his flame-throwing mode and the style of talk show that people remember Dave doing.

“I figured I couldn’t do the show the way Wally did it, so I started flame throwing,” Dave says. “I mean I had an opinion about everything. It managed to get a reaction (not always favorable). Wally tended not to be very confrontational, so I stood out like a sore thumb. It’s not what people listen to, it’s what they remember and can write it down in a rating diary and back in the late 70’s my show had a 40 share of the Flint audience.”

And just like Howard Stern in New York City – radio listeners in Flint, Michigan might not have liked or even loved Dave Barber, but they would listen to him just to hear what he would say next or who he would verbally dissect without missing a beat.

A complicated radio personality – Dave was part newsman, part antagonist and part Las Vegas lounge lizard who would like nothing more than to be a part of Old Blue Eye’s Rat Pack. On one hand Dave Barber could be playful on the radio, but most of the time you took him pretty seriously and the last thing you ever wanted to do was to get in a pissing match with him. He warned more than a few of the callers to his show – “If you want to play mental gymnastics with me, I’ll tell you right now, you’re going to lose,” and he would see to it that even your best argument didn’t hold water and you weren’t worthy to even take up any of his time. With Dave Barber – you either loved him or hated him….and he usually made sure that there was no middle ground for you to choose. He knew how to push his listeners’ buttons and get them to respond, and in turn, it’s safe to say that Dave Barber provided Flint with some pretty exciting talk radio.

It’s been four years since Dave Barber’s voice has been heard on Flint radio. In March of 2006, Dave left his hometown of Flint, Michigan to take a morning spot on WPRO radio in Providence, Rhode Island. The radio business is not unlike any other business – if you want to move up in your career you had to take some challenges and Dave knew that the job in Providence was that next big step in his radio career, but it’s not easy to leave your comfort base and move to a new area where nobody knows your name or who you are.

“The move was far more difficult then I expected,” Dave said. “I did not know one single person and to be honest with you, I don’t know if I would have made the move if I knew what I know now.”

After nearly a year in his new job, Dave received his first employee performance review from the vice-president of talk programming for Citadel broadcasting (the company that owns WPRO, as well as WJR in Detroit and the ABC Radio Network). Dave got a glowing review and everything was coming up roses, or so he thought.

“I was so excited about the good review,” Dave says, “I decided to treat myself to a vacation in Miami to see the Super Bowl. Things changed though when I got back to Providence -- On my first day back from vacation, I was fired. And to complicate the matter even more -- the general manager of the station wouldn’t even give me the reason why I was being let go -- I was just told that I would understand in a few days.”

A few days passed and Dave discovered the reason he was let go. A former Rhode Island radio personality, who was better known, had just been fired from his job in Boston and was now available, so WPRO decided to bring him back to Providence.

“So, I was the odd guy out when they hired him to come back to the market. Plus, I don’t think it helped that I questioned the war in Iraq on the air, because the General Manager’s husband was a military General. A little something that nobody bothered to tell me about.”

It shouldn’t come as a surprise that Dave was vocal about his feeling against the war in Iraq – he’s always let his feelings known on the air about the issues of the day – whether it was the war, the Auto World fiasco, abortion rights or capital punishment and he wasn’t afraid to take on people in power.

Dave’s feud with former Flint Mayor Woodrow Stanley was pretty much chronicled by the Flint Journal.

“Woodrow was simply corrupt,” Dave said about the former mayor. “He circled himself with corrupt people and he didn’t like it that I let people know that about him.”

How many talk show hosts do you know that have to protect themselves against the people that they talk about on the air? Not too many, but at one point during the Stanley feud, Dave was allegedly struck by the former mayor and he had to have a restraining order issued against him.

“Hey, Stanley loved me so much that he called me ‘his bitch’ to anyone who brought up my name.”

Dave irritated some other politicians – such as former Michigan governor John Engler. Dave challenged Engler -- who embraced “family values” during his campaign for governor -- yet allegedly abused and cheated on his first wife – according to a request for an annulment from the Catholic Church that Engler’s wife filed.

“She said she would sue me if I reported it,” Dave said. “I did and she didn't, so you see truth is a defense.”

As much as Dave loves to talk about his days in talk radio – he knows that those days are now over and he feels that was is happening now in the radio business is sad and embarrassing.

Currently, Dave Barber is the program director for Rhode Island’s Capitol Television.

“Think of it as C-Span for Rhode Island. I report to the Speaker of the House and I serve as the stations’ only on air person. It’s all politics all the time. My life today is completely different then it has ever been and I have never been happier.”

When Dave Barber lived and worked in the Flint area – he ate at only the finest restaurants in the area…today, Dave Barber enjoys eating meals at home -- meals that he cooks on his deluxe grill and, if you believe some of his Facebook postings, he has become a pretty fair grill master.

And when asked about what he misses about the Flint area, Dave answers quickly, “Koegel Viennas! Here in Little Rhody they call coney dogs “hot wieners”. I was spoiled in Flint. A hot dog in Flint is like filet mignon. The dogs here crawl out of the bun.”

Anyone wishing to forward some Kogel’s out Dave’s way – you can contact him at Capitol Television. You could call him at home – but he might be too busy grilling or getting ready for an evening in front of the television watching “American Idol.”

In the interest of full disclose -- the author of this blog, Rich Frost, was once Dave Barber’s producer at WTAC – which doesn’t make him a bad guy – but it’s something he thought you might like to know.

A Classic TV Movie....More Problems for Jay Leno and NBC...and There's Some Good TV to Be Found on Basic Cable

2010-07-05T01:17:00.000-04:00

Can you read this?

I think my fingers have gotten a little chubbier after all that I have to eat this fourth of July weekend and the extra chub might affect my typing skills – so bear with me if a few words are spelled wrong. The food this Fourth of July weekend was pretty much delicious – with the exception of some food that I sampled on a trip up north Friday and I have to give credit to Marty and her youngest son Bill, who pretty much has become the family’s “Grill Master Extraordinaire”!

But enough about food and the fourth – let’s talk some TV and there is a lot on TV to talk about.

“Duel” anyone?

The fine arts and entertainment channel Ovation (DirecTV Channel 274/Dish Network Channel 157) has been highlighting the work of some film directors a little ahead of their time with a series called “American Revolutionaries: The Directors”. One of the directors featured in this series is Stephen Spielberg and the movie that they’re showing is the classic made-for-TV movie that he directed for ABC named “Duel” starring Dennis Weaver (who many people may still remember as Chester on the old CBS western “Gunsmoke”).

For those of you who aren’t familiar with the movie “Duel” – it’s the story of a salesman (Dennis Weaver) who decides to take the scenic route to his next appointment, but little did he know that he was going to be terrorized by a faceless driver in a huge semi-truck that has the words “flammable” printed in big block letters on the back and side of the truck. It doesn’t matter of Dennis Weaver is in front or in back of this semi – he’s pushed and terrorized the whole time. You never see the face of the driver in the truck throughout the whole film – but you don’t have to – because every time that you see this truck you know things are going to get a little ugly for Weaver.

According to the people hosting this show -- this low budget TV movie was all that Spielberg needed to kick start his career – because the first film that he got to direct after “Duel” was aired was “Jaws” and everyone remembers how that movie scared people at the beaches the summer that it was released.

Another director that they’re highlighting in this series is Mel Brooks – who wrote (with Richard Pryor and Gene Wilder) and directed one of my favorite movies of all time “Blazing Saddles”. I actually seen this movie in a theater some ten times and laughed just as hard the tenth time that I did the first time that I saw this film. Unfortunately, this series on Ovation won’t be showing “Blazing Saddles”, but will be airing another Brooks’s classic “The Producers”…is everybody ready for “Springtime for Hitler”?

NBC: More Problems than Hits

Remember last summer when NBC tried to convince us that come September we would all be turning to NBC for Jay Leno at 10? NBC told producers and program suppliers that instead of those expensive prime-time drama programs – they were going to cut cost with running Leno five nights a week at ten with a fresh new show every night. Leno at 10 was probably the biggest programming bomb in NBC history next to “Pink Lady and Jeff” and “Super Train”. Leno bombing at 10pm brought about another programming blunder – when NBC thought they would send Jay Leno back to 11:35 and in turn – take “The Tonight Show” away from Conan O’Brien, who had only been hosting the show for seven months.

One of the reasons that they gave Conan his walking papers was because his ratings were smaller than what Leno got when he did “The Tonight Show”. NBC probably thought that they would put Leno back at 11:35 and everything would be ok – it would be like the whole “Leno at 10” fiasco was some soap opera dream sequence that never happened in real life. Well…it happened….and here’s the kicker to the story: Jay Leno’s ratings at 11:35 are actually worse than what Conan was getting for NBC and Conan was attracting a younger audience that what Jay does…oh well. It’s going to be interesting to see what kind of audience Conan is going to pull in when he premieres this November on basic cable TBS.

More problems for NBC

One of the shows that NBC was hoping would be a big ratings draw for them come September is a new show called “Love Bites”. The show, similar in format to the old TV show “Love American Style”, is having a few problems getting off the ground. The woman who wrote the pilot, and who was once one of the top writers on “Sex and the City”, has left the show and one of the stars of the show – Becki Newton (who suppose to be a virgin on the show) has gotten pregnant. So, instead of a September premiere – NBC is pushing back production on the show and they’re hoping to have “Love Bites” in shape for a January premiere.

With an hour hole to fill in the prime time schedule – NBC has turned to “The Donald” for a new season of “The Apprentice”. Unlike the past few seasons that have featured celebrities – sixteen people are going to fight to become Donald Trump’s Apprentice and these people are combination of people who have either lost their jobs or are recent college graduates, who have had a hard time getting noticed in today’s job market.

Good TV is Easy to Find This Summer on Basic Cable

Traditional over the air television is in deep trouble – especially when basic cable channels are beating them at their own game. When a basic cable channel like TV Land can attract broadcast network size audience with a mediocre sitcom like “Hot in Cleveland” – something is really wrong.

Last week, FX aired the first episode of the new comedy “Louie” starring comedian Louis C.K. and it’s probably one of the funniest shows on television today. The premise of the show is nothing unusual – it’s basically the same thing that Jerry Seinfeld did on NBC – but Louis C.K.’s comedy has more bite than a shark at feeding time. Where Jerry Seinfeld could be a little “cute” with things like the girl with the name that sounded like a…you know what….or give new meaning to the phrase “master of your own domain” – Louis C.K. comes out and tells it like it is. Catch “Louie” Tuesday nights at 11pm on FX.

Fans of Dennis Leary and “Rescue Me”….the show is back on FX Tuesday nights at 10pm. This is the last season for the show – so you don’t want to miss one episode to see how Tommy fares this season with his libido and battles with the bottle. (Note: Dennis Leary has signed with FX to do a new series after the completion of “Rescue Me”).

Jason Lee (of “My Name Is Earl” fame) is back as a Memphis cop who loves Elvis on the new TNT show “Memphis Blues” – Tuesdays at 10pm on TNT. I caught the premiere episode of the show last week and it shows some promise – and if you watch closely – you’ll see some of Jason’s old cast mates from Earl pop up in the show.

Last, but not least, fans of Kyra Sedgwick and “The Closer” – the new season returns to TNT – Monday, July 12. Expect some big changes to happen to Brenda and her job with the Los Angeles police department – let’s hope that budget cuts don’t split up her team of detectives.

Well, my stomach has settled down from all of the fourth of July goodies that I have consumed….so, I think I’ll find the remote control and set back and enjoy a show or two….and until the next time…remember – it’s only TV.

Memories Of Norm Perry, WTAC's Chief Engineer

2010-06-28T15:31:00.000-04:00

It takes a lot of people to run a radio station – you need sales people to sell advertising, traffic people to place the advertising on the broadcast schedules, announcers to voice the commercials and do an air shift and it also helps if you have a good chief engineer on staff to make sure that your station stays on the air and sounding good. Before deregulation hit the broadcast industry – a good chief engineer was as valuable to your radio station as the top rated morning and afternoon drive-time air personalities. I am lucky to have been able to spend some time and to have known one of Flint and the Tri-Cities’ best chief engineers – the late Norm Perry from WTAC.

I think of Norm Perry every so often – especially when I’m just goofin’ off on the Internet listening to my favorite Internet radio station or playing a game or two of Sudoku. Norm Perry died just as computers were coming into being and long before the Internet. He had a computer chess game that he loved to play and he was beside himself when he would win a game or two against the computer. I think it was that primal man against machine and man actually beat the machine – thump thump thump the chest – kind of thing.

I think Norm owned a one of the early Commodore computers, but he had no idea of how advanced that computers would become and how big it would become in homes and businesses around the world. He was more interested in challenging the computer than to harness it to do things for him.

Norm Perry lived just as Timex started making LCD watches and people were playing Pac-Man and Frogger on Atari game machine. Imagine what kind of things someone like Norm Perry could do today with computers as powerful as they are today and of the ideas that he could connect with and grow just by harnessing all that the Internet has to offer.

Another thing that I can remember about Norm is that he loved to shop the garage sales. Norm would check out the pickings – maybe see a television set that didn’t work for fifteen bucks and would end up convincing the owner that it wasn’t worth more than five bucks. He’d give the person a fiver….take the TV set home….fix it with a turn of a knob or a touch of his soldering gun and get the TV working like it was brand new and sell it for seventy-five bucks.

The same kind of skills that he used in profiting from garage sales he put to use in his daily job as a chief engineer. Even though the chief engineer was a valuable person to the existence of a radio station – back when Norm was a chief engineer management at radio stations were pretty tight with a buck and they didn’t really give people like Norm the kind of budget that they needed – so you had to be creative in how you solved problems.

When Dave Barber came over to WTAC from WTRX to do “Flint Feedback” – Norm was called upon to devise a tape delay so that we could “bleep” anything that needed to be bleeped. Naturally, a professional tape delay device wasn’t in WTAC’s budget, but you can’t have someone doing a daily talk show and not have some sort of delay device. Well…it didn’t take long for Norm to access the problem and come up with a solution of a long tape loop between two huge broadcast reel-to-reel players with a “dump” button in Barber’s studio and at console where the producer (yours truly) sat. It worked and it cost the station next to nothing and it prevented more than a few obscene words from going out over the air.

Norm and I did talk about things other than radio. At least once a week, we would both venture to the Ponderosa Steak House on Hill Road (no longer there) and feast on that $2.99 lunch special – which was the ground steak patty, baked potato, salad bar and drink. We could have spent more for lunch – but we loaded up a lot on the salad bar and the rolls and it was enough for us.

During lunch we’d talk about cable television – which was just taking its infant steps. ESPN existed of only one channel and I remember reading how they were on shaky ground financially as was CNN. Neither of us had any solutions to how these stations could survive – but we were both intrigued by what they were going to do to survive.

There’s one thing that I will always remember about Norm – and it wasn’t how creative he was in his job or how smart he was – nope – I like to remember Norm as my friend. I miss those Saturday nights – when Norm would visit me at my apartment on Richfield and Averill carrying a six pack of cold ones that we would enjoy as we watched the fights on HBO. Neither of us were boxing aficionados, but we knew enough to make watching the fight enjoyable and it gave a chance to just be friends. Norm….I miss ya!

TV's Summer Season is Cooking -- Plus There Are A Couple of Really Funny New Shows

2010-06-25T18:53:00.000-04:00

Where does all of the time go? It’s hard to believe that we’re already half-way through 2010 and in a matter of days it will be July 4th and before you know it – Jerry Lewis is going to be hosting another telethon – is this year is going fast or what??!!! Before you know it – we’re all going to be bitching about the cold temperatures and how we’re being pounded by cold fronts and snow storms.

Well. It’s been awhile since I have written anything of interest on this blog – and I wouldn’t want to blow that winning streak – so, I might as well talk about something I know nothing about – but love to talk about any way – television.

The Summer TV season has arrived and it’s time that we all took a break away from all of the news on the mess in the Gulf and escape with some mindless television entertainment. If you’re a foodie – the people who gave you the Food Network have blessed us with another channel – “The Cooking Channel”…a channel filled with a lot of old Food Network programming like “Emeril Live” and some new food shows from their Food Network operations in Canada. The people who own these two networks are positioning the Cooking Channel for those who love to cook and the Food Network as a reality based food network with cooking competition shows mixed in with the regular programming. Either way you look at it – it’s a lot of food programs!

If you want to find out how important you are to the Food Network or Cooking Channel – if the program you’re doing has you preparing food with cheap production music that you would normally hear play in the background in porn movie – you’re not that important to these channels. If they have porn music playing behind your cooking demonstrations – the odds are pretty good that you won’t be asked to compete on “Iron Chef America” or be a featured chef on one of their Food documentaries.

There is a lot of food competition programming on TV these days. For over the top dramatics – there’s Gordon Ramsey’s “Hell’s Kitchen” on Fox with a bunch of chefs competing to be a chef in one of his restaurants. The Food Network is back with another season of “The Next Food Network Star” on Food Network, and the classiest food competition show of the bunch “Top Chef” is back on Bravo with this season’s competition taking place in our nation’s capital – Washington, D.C.

Gordon Ramsey is adding another show to his Fox TV workload. Unlike “Hell’s Kitchen” and “Kitchen Nightmares” – it looks like we’re going to see a much softer and caring Chef Ramsey with the premiere of his new show in July on Fox called “”Master Chef”. On this show – a slew of chefs will be competing to become a master chef – what they’ll receive once they obtain that title remains to be seen – but there’s one thing that is guaranteed – the show will be entertaining as all hell.

Imagine being a geeky kid in eighth grade – who’s in love with the most beautiful girl in school – but he can only get the attention of a geeky eighth grade girl and you have MTV’s newest comedy “The Hard Times of RJ Berger”. Now you have got to remember that all of RJ’s friends are complete geeks and nerds….that is until in the middle of a basketball game – in front of the whole school – his basketball shorts are pulled down and his jock strap falls to the floor exposing what is perhaps the largest, you know what, to everyone in the bleacher stands. All of a sudden – RJ’s popularity takes a turn to something more than just nerds and geeks. This is one funny show….Monday nights at 10pm on MTV.

Following RJ at 10:30 on MTV is a new show “Warren the Ape” is a spin-off of another live action puppet comedy “Greg the Bunny” that has aired on several cable networks. “Warren the Ape” is a puppet who’s career has taken a bit of a turn….he’s gone from being an “A” list celebrity to a “D” list and below. He’s also in “Celebrity Rehab” – complete with appearances by Dr. Drew Pinsky himself – hoping that it might revitalize his career. If you want to laugh and laugh out loud – check out “Warren the Ape” Monday nights at 10:30pm on MTV.

Betty White continues to be hot hot hot…with the premiere of her new sitcom “Hot in Cleveland” attracting some five million people to TV Land. The show, which also stars Jane Leeves (“Fraiser”) and Valerie Bertinelli “One Day At A Time”) is about three women from Los Angeles who land in Cleveland and discover that unlike the west coast – men are actually attracted to them and don’t think of them as “old”. They decide to rent a home in Cleveland and Betty White is the person who maintains the house. The premise is a bit lame – but Betty White could read tea leaves and make it funny and she does it on this show. Its premiere episode on TV Land attracted some five million viewers – which is more viewers than NBC had when they tried to unload Jay Leno in the 10pm slot. (“Hot in Cleveland” airs at 9pm Wednesday Nights on TV Land and on CMT later in the week.)

The afternoon TV landscapes is going to look at lot different come September – when Oprah leaves daytime TV to begin a new career on a new cable network – the Oprah Winfrey Network (OWN). TV stations that carry Oprah now are looking for programming to put in Oprah’s time slot that will hopefully bring in the same size audience every day that Oprah has been delivering. One of the shows that is profiting from Oprah leaving daytime TV is another Oprah Winfrey produced program – Dr. Oz. Beginning in September – Dr. Oz’s show will move from its 3pm time slot on Channel 4 in Detroit to Oprah’s 4pm time slot on Channel 7 – and the show is getting similar upgrades at other stations around the country.

In other TV news: It was nice seeing Bryant Gumble hosting “The View” last week. It’s been a long time since we have seen Bryant on commercial television (he still does a show for HBO) and I forgot how good he was and how comfortable his on-the-air style is – especially against some of the screaming and yelling that goes on during that show.

And – one last thing before I leave. I started out this blog entry by mentioning how quickly this year is going by – well…here’s another shocker for you. Believe it or not – Beatle drummer Ringo Starr is going to be 70 years old this July. You heard me – 70 years old! If Ringo’s 70 – how old does it makes all of us who remember him as one of the mop top Beatles?

It's Only TV:Dr Drew's Rehab Troubles, The Celebrity Apprentice That Won't Go Away and Sir Paul meets the President

2010-06-08T12:33:00.002-04:00

It’s only TV and in this edition – Dr. Drew has some problems with Celebrity Rehab….Brett Michaels is named “Celebrity Apprentice” and now he won’t go away…Paul McCartney gets an award from the President and stirs up trouble in DC..and there’s a bunch of new cooking competition show. There’s a lot to talk about, so let’s begin!

You got to be kidding me!

Have you noticed something missing from your reality programming line-up lately? Its America’s favorite train wreck reality show – “Celebrity Rehab” and a new season of it should be on the air, but it isn’t…why? Believe it or not -- it looks like Dr. Drew Pinsky is having a hard time finding celebrities to do the show. The somewhat big celebrity names with drug or sex rehab problems – stars like Lindsay Lohan, Charlie Sheen and Jesse James aren’t interested in detoxing in front of the cameras for the entire world to see and it’s hard to find even C- and D-grade list celebrities and porn stars that are willing or desperate enough to do a celebrity rehab. Let’s hope the good doctor keeps on looking for some new celebrities to put through the rehab process, because we don’t need more retreads of celebrities from past seasons shows back for return visits – it’s gets a little tiring.

Every Rose Has Its Thorn…So Does Being A TV Celebrity

Brett Michaels has got to be kissing Donald Trump’s ass big time while thanking God for sparing him after his recent medical problems – because his career has never been hotter than what it is today. Let’s be honest about Brett Michaels – the bulk of his career recently hasn’t been as some chart burning rock star who filled the arenas and who’s songs were in heavy rotation on the radio. The only time you hear his music today are classic rock radio stations playing his hit from the 90s (“Every Rose Has Its Thorn”) when he fronted the band Poison. The bulk of Michael’s career lately has been on a VH-1 reality show “Rock of Love” – where he has babes vying for his attention ala ABC’s “The Bachelor” (only a bit more rock star sleazy) – this is not the show that careers are built on. But, someone was watching over his lame ass – and that someone was none other than Donald Trump...

When Donald Trump and his producers were casting last season’s “Celebrity Apprentice”, they needed some sort of crazed misfit celebrity to fill the ranks of contestants vying for “Celebrity Apprentice” gold. In past seasons, they have cast country music stars as would-be apprentices, now was the time to give a bone to rock and roll community – for the ladies team they brought in Cyndi Lauper and for the men’s team….Brett Michaels.

If you watched this season’s Celebrity Apprentice – you were probably surprised that Brett Michaels went as far as he did in the competition. Let’s be honest – Michaels can be somewhat of a buffoon and more of a rock n’ roll character than a true rock n’ roll star. If all be said and told – if Michaels had not had the serious medical problems that he had (which took place after everything but the season finale of Apprentice had been taped), Holly Robinson Peete would have mopped the floor with him with a take-no-prisoner approach and won Celebrity Apprentice. But, riding a wave of sympathy for his health problems – there was no way that Trump could not crown him as this year’s Celebrity Apprentice winner during the live season finale. Hell, for Michaels to even make it to the season finale – which is something that his doctors told him that he shouldn’t attend….pretty much cemented the odds that he would be given him the title, right.

So, Michaels is crowned Celebrity Apprentice and you would naturally think that with all of his medical problems that he would take a breather – enjoy the family, etc. Fat chance. From the Apprentice finale – he went and did “Regis and Kelly”, there was a “Tonight Show” appearance and he popped up and performed with the idols on the season finale of “American Idol”…is there no stopping him? Now, there’s talk that he’s in consideration to fill Simon Cowell’s spot at the judging table on “American Idol”. If there is a God that watches over television – please don’t make Brett Michaels an “American Idol” judge! I don’t care if he served as a judge for a season on the country music talent show “Nashville Star” – no more Brett Michaels. There are enough signature cliché judging comments on the show now (“a little pitchy, dawg), we don’t need a bunch of worn out rock n’ roll clichés to add to them. Plus, there has got to be someone of more stature to fill Simon’s place than Brett Michaels…if not…pack the show up now and forget about it.

With A Little Help From His Friends

Leave it to a Beatle to stir things up and piss a few people off. On June 2^nd, President Obama presented Sir Paul McCartney with the prestigious Library of Congress Gershwin Prize for Popular Song. The ceremony, which took place in the East room at the White House, featured a who’s who of music from Herbie Hancock to Elvis Costello, Emmy Lou Harris to Faith Hill, Stevie Wonder to the Jonas Brothers and comedy from Jerry Seinfeld. The concert, which featured all of the musical acts performing either McCartney songs from the Beatles to his songs from his solo career, was recorded and will be aired on PBS on July 28^th. (I’ll bet you that it airs during one of their beg-a-thon weeks, too, which is something like every other week, isn’t it?).

Highlights of the night included Sir Paul performing the classic Beatle song “Michelle” for the first lady and the finale of the evening with everyone in attendance joining in and singing the chorus of “Hey Jude.”

When presented with the award from President Obama, McCartney said, “Getting this prize would be good enough, but getting it from this president…” and he smiled.

McCartney stressed that we are going through some difficult times and added that there are “billions of us who are rooting for you.”

But it was the comment McCartney made when receiving the award that is pissing a few people off and most of those are in the Republican Party with no sense of humor. In receiving the award, McCartney thanked the Library of Congress and said, “After the last eight years, it’s great to have a president who knows what a library is.”

Speaking of Jerry Seinfeld

If you’re like me – scratching your head trying to figure why in the hell Jerry Seinfeld was part of the Paul McCartney awards show and presentation at the White House – maybe he was bored and was looking for something to do. If the truth be told – Jerry Seinfeld probably doesn’t have to work another day in his life (which might explain why he’s lowered his comedy standards to be one of the producers of “The Wedding Ref”). It has been reported that Jerry’s TV show “Seinfeld” continues to rake in the cash twelve years since the last original episode aired on NBC. How much? Believe it or not, The TV show “Seinfeld” has raked in some 2.7 billion – with a “b” – dollars in syndication and stations are still paying big bucks to get the rights to air the show with no end in sight – which I’m pretty sure Jerry is getting a nice little cut.

Look what’s cooking?

Attention foodies! We’re being spoiled when it comes to reality TV cooking competition shows. Chef Ramsey is back with another season of “Hell’s Kitchen” on Fox and its fun just to watch him get pissed off and throw plates of food all about – plus, you have got to admit – his show can get some pretty bizarre contestants.

Food Network is looking for the next Rachel Ray and Guy Fieti on a new season “The Next Food Network Star”. I recorded the show, but have yet to watch it, so I can’t comment on how the people competing – although I do I have to say that I haven’t agreed with the final choices that they have made the last couple of seasons.

But the show of all competition cooking shows – the show with a little class “Top Chef” will be returning to the Bravo cable network on June 16^th. Sharpen your knifes -- this season of Top Chef will be taking place in DC, as in the District of Columbia and you will probably see a politician or two somewhere along the line – but can you find anyone who’s bipartisan in Washington even when it comes to food? We will find out.

That’s going to do it for now – so – pick up the remote and do a little channel surfing…until we meet again….remember, it’s only TV.

From Hooters To BP and A Tip Of The Hat To Burger King

2010-06-05T09:36:00.003-04:00

Can you believe it – It’s June already! We’re already half-way through the year 2010 and what do we have to show for it? Not a whole lot – but there are enough bits and pieces laying about that I think I can gather together to form another hodgepodge of random thoughts and ideas that I like to call “Frostbites”.

It doesn’t take a whole lot to make me feel old. Last week, a bunch of the guys that I use to work with at RadioFirst in Port Huron got together for lunch and the restaurant that they chose to meet at – Hooters of Port Huron. First, let me say – we had a good time at Hooters and the food was good (although a tad expensive for what we got), but at the end of the lunch I couldn’t shake that “I’m too damn old for Hooters” feeling. It use to be that I could say that I was old enough to be any one of the Hooter girls’ father – but I have actually gotten to that age where I could be their grandfather – and that’s a jolt to the old psyche. When you get to be my age and you’re face to face with a Hooters waitress bent over the top of the table showing some cleavage as she takes your order – you know you’re just one step away from entering “dirty old man territory” if you decide to “take in the sights”. Once you realize that you have become too old for a place like Hooters – the next question that one asks himself is – “when did this happen?” Yup, it was only yesterday that I was of the Woodstock generation and now I’m in that generation that takes all of the medications and medicines advertised during the evening network newscasts.

Pet Peeve. As I have mentioned in past blogs – I love the Sunday morning news shows and journalism review shows like “Reliable Sources” with Howard Kurtz on CNN – but some television journalists can really piss me off. I can’t tell you how many times that I have heard a television journalist bitch that they aren’t being taken seriously and in the next breath call the news broadcast that they are working on “a show”. To me – a news broadcast is a news broadcast and a show is something that Mickey Rooney and Judy Garland use to put on in the barn or that Jim Henson use to do with the Muppets. If you want to be taken seriously – call what you do what it is – if it’s a show that you aren’t a journalist you’re an entertaining minstrel -- but that’s just my opinion.

Candy bar anyone? I have come to the conclusion that when it comes to candy bars – you can’t go wrong with a Snickers with its caramel, nougat, peanuts and milk chocolate covering.

“Flavor of the month”. Tomato and basil – it has got to be the new “in” flavor. One of the newest flavors of Nabisco’s Wheat Thins just happens to be tomato and basil and Lay’s has introduced a new tomato and basil flavored potato chip. I give high marks to Nabisco’s tomato and basil Wheat Thins – the new flavor element makes this cracker more enjoyable….the same thing can’t be said for the Lay’s chip though. The tomato and basil flavoring is not as pronounced on the potato chip as it is on the cracker – you get a bit of the tomato taste, but nothing like what Nabisco is giving on you the cracker. If I had to make a choice between the two for pure snacking enjoyment – Nasbisco’s Tomato and Basil Wheat Thin wins this one.

Burger King Is Selling What? I love Burger King. Their Steakhouse XL burger is more than just tasty – it’s downright delicious. I even give them a tip of the old cap when it comes to their dollar version of McDonald’s Sausage and Egg or Ham and Egg McMuffin. Both of them are not only delicious – but come on – they’re a dollar – which means that the price you would pay for one breakfast sandwich at McDonald’s you can get two just as tasty breakfast sandwiches at Burger King – what a deal! But, I still can’t wrap my head around going to Burger King for ribs. Yup, Burger King raises the bar on the premium side of their menu with ribs – what’s next lobster tail?

Just when you thought things couldn’t get worse…..

Is there nothing more sad than some of the pictures coming out from BP’s Gulf Coast oil spill of birds and wildlife so drenched in oil that they can’t move are left to die? It took over a month for BP to finally contain some of the leak, but who knows how long this fix is going to last after seeing some of the results from the work of BP’s team tech team to stop the leak.

It’s not enough that the people from BP that are trying to stop the leak are a bunch of bumbling idiots – we have their fearless leader, Tony Hayward, the big mucky muck CEO of BP who is probably going to go down in history as the king of all idiots. Hayward said in an interview this week that he wished that the whole thing with the spill was over with because he “wants his life back”. He wants his life back!!! Give me a break Hayward! Eleven people died on that rig when it exploded, Mr Hayward – they’d like their life back, too. The lives and livelihood on millions of people are being affected by this disaster of yours and it’s safe to say that the waters in the Gulf Coast will never be the same and you want your life back, Mr. Hayward. And now they’re saying that oil is being spotted on the Florida shores and it’s a good chance that the east coast is going to see some of BP’s oil come their way – Mr. Hayward – these people want their life back, too.

There’s more news from BP that’s pretty astounding. The federal government just presented them with the first bill for this disaster – something like sixty-seven million dollars and this shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone – nobody has seen a dime from BP. What is BP spending their money on? Believe it or not – it’s a fifty million dollar ad campaign that advertising experts have told CNN.com is “an expensive and probably ineffective bid to rehabilitate the energy giant's image.”

The ads – both print and TV – feature BP’s CEO Tony Hayward telling everyone how BP is working to fix the problem and clean-up the mess – they don't show you the other side of BP. You see, the same week this ad campaign come out -- a representative from BP, Randy Prescott, opens his mouth to assure seafood lovers that they shouldn't worry, because "Louisiana isn't the only place that has shrimp". He may be right, but it's his company's oil spill that's killing the shrimping areas in that part of the country and who knows if BP can ever restore area for fish and shrimp to return there..

I find it kind of ironic that BP has a public relations campaign already set up to “restore their image” and has yet to fully fix the problem that has presented them with this huge public relations problem to begin with.

So, it is with sadness that I present “The Biggest Dickheads in the World” award to goes to Tony Hayward and BP Oil. I urge everyone to boycott BP and Mr. Hayward, I hope that you will never get your life back and that you relive this tragedy over and over again. I would also love to see you criminally prosecuted in some way or another for this mess and that you rot in hell for being such an insensitive asshole -- but that's just my opinion. Mr. Hayward and BP Oil – this tar ball filled with oil is for you!

Remembering Radio's Golden Years

2010-06-01T01:30:00.004-04:00

I couldn’t help to think about radio when I heard on the news last week that Art Linkletter had died at the age of 97. I also thought about radio when I was channel surfing through the television dial on Sunday afternoon during the 94th running of the Indy 500. You see, my first recollections of Art Linkletter wasn’t from watching him on television, it was from listening to him on the radio….on WJR to be specific. And I can still remember walking around the Clio Road and Stewart Street area on Memorial Day weekend in 1967 with a transistor radio listening to the Indy 500 on the radio. If you wanted to see the race – you had to shell out some big bucks and see a closed circuit television broadcast of the race on a big screen – probably at the IMA Auditorium.

Radio was more important in people’s life then it is today. Radio not only entertained, but it also informed and I can remember how radio in Flint, Michigan was used effectively to “keep the peace” during the riots of 1967. Flint didn’t go up in flames like Detroit or L.A. because a daytime only radio station – WAMM – got permission and stayed on past sunset. The extra broadcast time gave WAMM’s Sam Williams and Flint’s first black mayor, Floyd McCree a direct voice to the people to spread the word that violence in the streets wasn’t the solution and that everyone needed to keep cool,

Being born in 1954 – I’m just old enough to remember the decline of the golden age of radio. For some strange reason – I can remember being about three or four years old and hearing Lawrence Welk and Eddie Fisher’s radio programs on the car radio while our family was driving upnorth to Cheboygan for a family get-together. I can’t give you any logical explanation why I should remember those two programs – but I do.

My memories of listening to Art Linkletter’s “House Party” on the radio were more vivid. CBS television aired the tv version of “House Party” every afternoon at 2:30, but an twenty-minute abbreviated version of the show aired on the CBS Radio network and WJR at 1:10 every afternoon. They seldom aired the same show each day on the television and the radio – but it was still fun to listen to – especially the segment with the kids.

The radio version of Art Linkletter’s “House Party” had one of the best lead-in radio network shows that there ever was – The Arthur Godfrey Show. When it comes to the history of radio and television – Arthur Godfrey was in a league of his own and couldn’t be touch. He could make and break entertainers and if you got the seal of approval from Godfrey – you had it made – just like authors who’s books are featured on Oprah have it made today. He was the perfect pitchman who knew how to sell a product by talking directly to the people and sell he did – pitching Lipton tea and refrigerators by Frigidaire to the masses.

At one time – it was a big deal for a radio station to be able to secure the rights to air events like the Indy 500 and the Detroit Tigers – because it was the only place you could turn to for free live coverage of the events and radio stations were able to make lots of money selling local advertising in these broadcasts. Now airing these events aren’t a big deal for radio broadcasters – they’re just another place for broadcasters to place “inventory” (ads). And, when these events are aired on a radio station – the odds are pretty good that the radio board operator plugging in the local commercials in these broadcasts are probably watching the game on TV as they “work the game” on the radio.

So, it is with the passing of Art Linkletter and the running of the Indy 500 race that I share with you my memories of radio. I’m sure there will be another event or moment in our daily life that will again spark some pleasant memories of the medium of radio – who’s golden age has long since faded.

How Dennis Hopper and "Easy Rider" Affected Me

2010-05-31T01:53:00.001-04:00

Actor Dennis Hopper died in Hollywood on Saturday at the age of 74. Although he was been known for the wide variety of roles that he has played from the alcoholic assistant basketball coach in “Hoosiers” (a role that earned him one of his two Oscar nominations) to the super creepy psychotic in the bizarre “Blue Velvet” – I will always associate Dennis Hopper and the movie “Easy Rider” (that he helped to write) with one thing – my first anxiety attack.

It was a warm Saturday night in the city of Flint, Michigan and a couple of my friends had come over to visit me. My friend Steve was just getting to “know” another friend of mine, Marianne, and instead of going out and doing something we decided that we would hang around my place and watch “Easy Rider” on Channel 7 WXYZ’s Saturday Evening Late Movie. I had never seen the movie before and my friend Steve had nothing but positive comments about the flick and thought that both Marianne and I would enjoy seeing it – even despite the heavy handed editing of a local TV station.

All three of us gathered together on this green couch that we had in our living room on Marshall Street. Steve and I book ended Marianne on the couch and somewhere over my shoulder sat my cat, High T. Kittycat. (You can assume how my cat got her name and you would probably be close. You have got to remember this was the early 70s and although the herb never played a big part in my life – it did when it came to this cat.).

Naturally, the first thing that grabs you about the movie “Easy Rider” was the music – I can’t remember movies using rock n’ roll music as effectively as they did in this movie, but all you had to do is take one look at Peter Fonda and Dennis Hopper to understand the rock n’ roll connection.

Get your motor running
Head out on the highway
Looking for adventure
In whatever comes our way

Yeah, darling
Gonna make it happen
Take the world in a love embrace
Fire all of your guns at once and
Explode into space

I like smoke and lightning
Heavy metal thunder
Racing in the wind
And the feeling that I'm under

Yeah, darling
Gonna make it happen
Take the world in a love embrace
Fire all of your guns at once and
Explode into space

Like a true nature child
We were born
Born to be wild
We have climbed so high
Never want to die
Born to be wild
Born to be wild

Wow! This movie is gonna be good, I thought.

It was at that point that something happened…something that had never happened to me before…and not knowing what it was – I got scared. For some reason – I felt my heart beating fast and I was having difficulty breathing – so, I left my friends on the couch and walked into the bathroom. I can remember looking at myself in the mirror as I alternated between putting a cold wash cloth on my face and sitting on the toilet burping and trying to go to the bathroom. I don’t know why I did those things – I just felt that they gave me some relief to what I was feeling…but it didn’t…because after about fifteen minutes in the bathroom – I had a big announcement to my friends.

“I’m sorry to have to do this,” I said, “But, I need for you to take me to the hospital, because I feel like I’m gonna die.”

I explained to my friends what I had been experiencing in the bathroom with the heart palpitations and the shortness of breath and they took me directly to the hospital that brought me into this world back in 1954 – St. Joesph’s Hospital on Flint’s east side. The doctors and nurses didn’t seem overly concerned – even though I felt like I was going to die. I can remember having x-rays done and even being hooked up to wires whereas after a little while the shortness of breath started to go away and the heart wasn’t beating as fast. I even started to joke with my friends that I was becoming Chief Ironside (the TV detective that Raymond Burr played that was pretty popular at the time) as I was being wheeled around in a wheelchair.

After a few hours – the doctors at St. Joseph’s Hospital informed me that I wasn’t dying and what I was experiencing was an anxiety attack. Well, you could have fooled me – I thought that the grim reaper was at my door and it was only a matter of time. I have learned since on how to deal with anxiety attacks – but the first one does leave an impression and for years – I place the blame for it directly on the movie “Easy Rider”. I was watching the movie when it happened and that had to been the trigger for the racing heart, shortness of breath and that feeling like I was going to die – so, I refused to watch the movie whenever it was on television, only because I felt like it might have that reaction on me again.

After that first anxiety attack – I wouldn’t travel anywhere without having my trusty brown lunch sack near by that I would use to breath in and ease the anxiety symptoms that I use to feel. (I also had the “Hospital” signs memorized between Flint and Gladwin, Michigan just in case I needed to visit one when I would go up north to visit my parents – but that’s another story).

And call me superstitious – but I have yet to watch the movie “Easy Rider” since that eventual night of the first anxiety attack and maybe I should watch it to honor the film legacy that Dennis Hopper has left behind. I mean, if I can get through “Blue Velvet” and not experience anything too creepy…”Easy Rider” should be a breeze, shouldn’t it?

Rest in peace, Mr. Hopper!

And That Was....

2010-05-27T16:15:00.000-04:00

American Idol 2010

I’ve got to be honest with you – American Idol this season was as disappointing as my first (and only) marriage. With the exception of Crystal Bowersox – the talent pool for this year’s American Idol was about as deep a Paris Hilton Mensa test and about as satisfying as a frozen waffle; and if it wasn’t for this being Simon Cowell’s last season as a judge – there was really no other compelling reason to watch AI this year.

Last year, American Idol had some exciting performers such as Adam Lambert and Chris Allen – this year it seemed like everyone who came out on stage to perform had an acoustic guitar – which doesn’t bode well for being really entertaining television. We were spoiled with Lambert last year who showcased not only his talents as a singer but as a performer – this year we got either a coffee house performance or performances on par of a touring Broadway musical cast.

It is my feeling that Crystal Bowersox was the only Idol performer who really gave everything that they had into every performance of the competition and it was only in the last couple of weeks that Lee stepped up his game, but he doesn’t come close to Bowersox in pure talent. I was pulling for ‘Big Mike’ to bust out – but he just didn’t have what it takes to cross over into that level of ‘I’m gonna blow you away’ and he was lucky to have lasted as long as he did.

Why did American Idol suck as badly as it did this year? I’m shocked that I’m even going to admit to this, but I feel it all comes down to Paula Abdul and her appearance on this year’s season’s finale made me realize that even more. With the producers not having signed Paula Abdul to a new contract before the season began – it resulted in producers devoted a lot of time in getting “guest judges” at all of the auditions that they didn’t have their eyes on the real prize of American Idol – the contestants. I know that Paula’s comments on the judging panel were pretty laughable – but she did provide some kind of glue to the show that was desperately missing this year.

I would be remised in not mentioning Ellen DeGeneres arrival to the Idol stage as a judge. I like Ellen. I find Ellen’s daily talk show to be entertaining and there have been some classic comedy moments on the talk show – which really made me look forward to her arrival on the Idol stage, but even she has been a bit of a disappointment this season. If you were to compare some of Paula Abdul’s lamest comments as a judge to some that Ellen made – Paula comes out more knowledgeable and credible in her comments than Ellen does.

I’m Not Gonna Watch It…

I wrote a review of the Jerry Seinfeld produced TV show, “The Marriage Ref” and even though it has been a minor hit for NBC – I still refuse to watch it and I don’t give a damn how many marquee names he gets to come on the show to be a ref. To me, “The Marriage Ref” sucks and when you allow crap like this to get an audience then don’t be surprised the networks throw more crap like this your way.

I have yet to watch Jay Leno since he returned to “The Tonight Show” and was thrilled to see him bomb at the recent Washington Correspondence Dinner. I’m still of the opinion that Jay Leno stabbed Conan O’Brien in the back after his prime time show failed by going back to the “Tonight Show”. Sure, Conan’s “Tonight Show” ratings were low – but so were Jay’s when he first hosted the show. Jay – you should have manned up and walked after the prime time show tanked and not yank Conan out of his seat on the “Tonight Show” – you could have refused NBC’s offer to go back – but you didn’t.

I am also proud of myself that I didn’t tune in to “Good Morning America” or “Nightline” to see them interview Sandra Bullock’s soon-to-be ex-husband, Jesse James. I don’t think that he can anything that is going to change my opinion of him being the biggest friggin’ douche bag jerk still sucking oxygen out of the air on this planet. And if Dr. Drew should decide that he might want to get James to appear on an upcoming season of “Sex Rehab with Dr Drew” on VH-1 – I will boycott that show, too!

What The…..

What the….!!!!! It’s the only way I can describe how I felt when I visited my local Burger King restaurant and see the signs all over the place for ribs. Yup, the King is now selling ribs – pork ribs at that – and they aren’t the pork processed ribs that McDonald’s has used for their McRib sandwiches…these are real bone-in ribs. I have yet to try them – but they are a little pricey – because they’re a lot smaller than the ribs that you might find at Applebee’s. But, let’s be honest with each other – who really is going to buy bone-in ribs from a drive-through burger restaurant who wants you to “have it your way”?

With all of that said – that’s going to do it for now. Until we meet again via the written word....keep the grin above your chin and good thoughts in your head.

Looking At You Looking At Me

2010-05-22T19:18:00.000-04:00

The internet is an interesting beast. Thanks to the internet anyone can express how they feel about anything and their message isn’t filtered for space or content (yuk, that sounds like something Sarah Palin might say) and the audience for that message can number a few or into the millions.

Even though I started writing this blog a long time ago, it’s only been the last six months or so that I have tried to disciplined myself to write in it with any kind of regularity. If you think that it’s easy to write something – the next time you sit down at your computer try and write 800 to 1000 words about something that interest you…it’s not easy.

One of the interesting things that I have discovered since I began writing this blog is that I don’t know a lot of the people that read it. Thanks to Google – I have been able to track a few things about the people who read this blog and some of the things that I have discovered even has me scratching my head saying, “What????”

Let’s just crunch some numbers. I will admit that these numbers aren’t huge – but it’s pretty impressive when you consider that there are actually people who are reading what I have written from my home in a small rural town in southeastern Michigan. Since January 6 – this blog has been host to 425 visitors who have visited some 724 times and have read over 1,223 total pages. Those figures are minuscule compared to a blog like Flint Expatriates or one of the major newspapers’ blogs – but I think it’s pretty impressive for someone who really just started blogging.

Here’s some other interesting tidbits of information that I have been able to gather about the readership of this blog: The 425 visitors come from 22 different countries and territories – with the United States leading the pack; and all but five of the fifty states have visited this blog.

The Google service that I use to track this blog can also tell me who the internet provider is for the people who click on this blog -- for example – of all of the internet providers the service being used by General Motors Corporation is the sixth most popular internet provider the readers of this blog. There is someone at General Motors Corporation who reads this blog (and on a regular basis) and he/she must have the blog bookmarked on their computer – because they aren’t clicking on some link to get to this blog. I have done some research and I have discovered that there is a person by the name of Rich Frost who works for GM and who knows – maybe some people are looking to this blog as something he wrote or whatever, but if it’s you, Rich Frost of GM fame, that is reading this blog – leave a little note and say “hi”.

This Thursday – only two people from Algeria and India clicked on to the blog and read it and you have to wonder why they chose to read what they read. One of these two countries read my recent blog about the Twitter page “Shit My dad Says” and the other country read my blog on the Anniversary of New Coke, The Bunless Sandwich at KFC and Kool-aid’s new Fizzies. Why would be of interest in these two blog posts to the people of India or Algeria? I dunno!

I only had two visitors to the blog on Friday, too, but it wasn’t what they read as to who they were: There was a return visit from my friend at General Motors Corporation and (the real head scratcher – and maybe they know what I can do for that) was when someone clicked on my blog from a computer in Georgia at the United States Center For Disease Control. I don’t know why they would be reading this blog – I haven’t talked about swine flu or an outbreak of cooties in the lower forty-eight states. Why would they click on this blog?

I’m always amused when some places in Flint click on the blog – such as Hurley Medical Center, the C.S. Mott Foundation and even the Flint Public Library (which I’m assuming is some body using the computers at the library linking up the blog)….but I have had more than one visit from the Flint Chamber of Commerce. Trust me – there isn’t a lot of “Come to Flint and Vacation” stuff in these pages….so why are they visiting this blog?

I was also surprised to see that the Associated Press actually paid a visit to my blog one day. I hope they were pleased with what they found and were counting the few photos from them that I may have pilfered.

I am enjoying writing this blog and I hope that there are one or two people out there who can find something of interest in all of this tossed together word salad of ideas and thoughts. Hopefully, I can keep the thing a little interesting and you keep on coming back…and don’t be afraid to leave a message or two if you do find something that you like or want to comment on.

As my old friend Dave Barber would say, “I’m gonna count my tips” and get outta here…until we meet again via the written word – keep the grin above your chin and good thoughts in your head.

Fox News And The Politics of Fear and Smear

2010-05-16T01:46:00.001-04:00

There are three shows that I record on the DVR each and every week. They aren’t the most popular TV shows on the air today. The combined viewership of all three of these shows is somewhat insignificant when it comes to ratings. The only thing that connects each of these shows is that my watching them confirms the fact that I’m a news junkie and nothing else.

What shows do I record every week? There’s “Fox News Watch” with the ‘fair and balanced’ network taking a look at the news media and how it is covering the news of the past week. I also record the last half-hour of ABC’s “This Week” – only because I’m more concerned with the roundtable discussions and the “In Memoriam” and “Sunday Funnies” features than I am the newsmaker interviews. And, last but not least, I record CNN’s “Reliable Sources” with Howie Kurtz from the Washington Post – which is another journalism review show with the emphasis being on the electronic media. I find all three of these shows to be informative and thought-provoking and, as crazy as this may sound, they all pass as entertainment for me on a Sunday afternoon.

I was grateful that there wasn’t anything heavy near me while I was watching this weekend’s edition of “Fox News Watch”, because I was this close to sending something sailing through the television screen – but why should I destroy a somewhat new television set because of some faux journalist’s little rant.

The top story on this week’s edition of “Fox News Watch” centered on President Obama and how they feel like his administration is micromanaging the news with this week’s announcement of nomination of Elana Kagan to the Supreme Court. The host, Jon Scott, stated that the White House posted a biography and an interview that a White House staffer did with Ms Kagan on the White House web page, but did not make her available to the media nor did the President take any questions about the nomination. The conservative side of the Fox News Watch panel asked where’s the transparency that President Obama promised in his administration and felt like the White House is trying to craft public opinion the way they see it.

If they stayed with the micromanaging the news and opinion angle – I might have agreed these people, but it’s where they took the discussion from there that got my blood boiling. Does the White House micromanage the news? Hell, yes – there isn’t a White House, State House, or Corporation around that doesn’t micromanage their message and try to slant public opinion in their favor, but instead of bitching about it good reporters dig behind the public relations to get the story.

But, Fox News Watch didn’t stop there. From micromanaging the news, Jon Scott, the host of Fox News Watch, went on to compared the White House effort to get their side of the story out on Ms. Kagan to that of Russia’s Pravda Pleeezzeee!

Was I angry when I heard Jon Scott say what he did? Damn straight! As I mentioned – everybody to some extent tries to craft public opinion – it’s just the way things are done – but comparing it to propaganda and Pravda is ridiculous. They can’t just disagree with President Obama – they have to paint him with a brush that makes him out to be some commie pinko socialist etc. It’s enough to watch someone like Hanniety or Glenn Beck call anyone who disagrees with them as fascists – but Fox News Watch is suppose to look at how the media is reporting the news, yet it’s part and parcel of the other shows on the network that yearns for the days of commie witch hunts and blacklists.

Jon Scott has been in the news business long enough to knows that the White House can’t totally isolate a Supreme Court nominee from the media and the media will get a chance to ask questions to and about the nominee. I’m sure that there will be more than enough news outlets to come out against Ms Kagan’s appointment to the bench, but to paint the White House efforts in getting out the story to Pravda is reckless for any news organization that paints itself as being “fair and balanced”.

And, Mr. Scott, why don’t you take a hard look at your network. You complain about the Obama administration micromanaging their public relations image – yet you have Karl Rove, the man responsible for getting out the message during the George W. Bush administration. Where were your comparisons of Karl Rove’s years of government service to that of Pravda? I sure didn’t hear any during the eight years of Bush, but Fox News loves to lob those subtle comparisons to communism and fascism when it comes to the Obama administration. It’s easier to smear and spread fear than it is to do some actual reporting isn’t it, Mr. Scott.

You've Got (Junk) E-mail

2010-05-14T15:48:00.001-04:00

I use to think that the post office delivered too much junk mail to my mail box – but I discovered that it’s nothing to the amount of junk mail that’s e-mailed to me each and every day.

I don’t care what kind of filters you have set up for your e-mail account – you can’t avoid the junk mail. I am amused sometimes by the various ways people hide their true identity so that they can pitch discount drugs, penis enlargement devices and creams and pills to keep an erection harder longer (or is that longer harder…I dunno). I don’t know one person who has ever bought any of the products that are part and parcel of the junk mail people receive on the internet, but you know that there is got to be someone out there who has, because these people wouldn’t be trying so hard to get us to buy if someone hadn’t purchased their products.

I think that every e-mail account that has ever been created has had that e-mail delivered to it with the news from South Africa, (or some place like that), informing us that we could be a part of a million dollar settlement from someone with the same last name as ours. All that you have to do to stake your claim was to wire something like ten thousand dollars to this guy to get the ball rolling on the legal paper work. Yeah! I don’t know about your family – but the Frost side of my family is not exactly known for having money…especially money hidden away in some South African country. The person writing this e-mail would more likely find government cheese and peanut butter in a Frost family safety deposit box before they found millions of dollars in cash. So, I instantly hit the delete button any time I see one of those e-mails in my computer’s mailbox.

There’s another type of e-mail that has always amazed me – only because I know the people sending them are intelligent and rational people – yet they fall victim to what is essentially an internet chain letter. I don’t care how many people you can convince to forward your e-mail to other people – a special message is not going to pop up on your computer screen and Bill Gates is not going to send you money; and you won’t be getting a twenty-five dollar gift certificate to the Olive Garden, Chili’s, Red Lobster, Wal-Mart or Target – if ten or a hundred people respond to your e-mail. It just ain’t gonna happen, folks – get real!

Another e-mail that instantly gets deleted from my e-mail are messages from people sending me their testimonies on how they have found God and how much better my life would be if I accept Him into my life. I’m happy that my friends have found God (personally, I never thought he was lost), but I get a little pissed off when they start to force their belief in God on me.

There’s another category of e-mail that I find puzzling and it’s the God chain-letter. What’s puzzling about these e-mails are what they are really saying….such as if I send this e-mail to so many people that God will bless me riches and good health. I don’t know about your God, but my God doesn’t grant people things by how many people I can get to answer a chain letter e-mail…my God blesses those who believes. Which brings up another interesting question – is God a PC or a Mac? And if God owns an I-Pod – wouldn’t you like to know what apps he has downloaded? I’m getting off the subject – I’m sorry.

And how many times have we received that email that contains an article “supposedly” written by comedians Jay Leno or late George Carlin that you know these people have never written or said in their entire life-time. George Carlin wrote the brilliant comedy bit about the “Ten Words You Can’t Say On Television”, I’m sure that he wouldn’t waste his time writing some right-wing rant and rave – he would have left something like that to some no-talent, like Dennis Miller. (Remember when Dennis Miller was actually funny?)

I am guilty of sending political e-mails to my friends – but I have cut back on those only because I know that what ever I send out to people it’s not going to convince them to change their political beliefs. What frustrates me about some of the political e-mails that I receive these days is how hateful the political discourse has gotten in the last couple of years. It’s hard to believe that I know people who still question President Obama’s place of birth, but I do and they’re never going to give up on that belief.

I also get e-mails from people about what’s happening in Arizona with their new immigration law. The e-mails address everything but what the law really does – which makes racial profiling legal and lets law enforcement officials ask anyone for proof of citizenship if you think that you might be an illegal. Will this law save any lives? Probably not. Will it stop illegal aliens from entering our country to find work? Probably not – if you want to do that – force the companies that hire the illegal aliens to quit hiring them and force them to hire legal citizens and pay them a decent wage and benefits – that’s not going to happen either because they need the cheap labor. If you want to discuss the immigration problem with me – don’t send me e-mails full of your rhetoric and vitriol that include racist depictions of what you think Mexican people look like – because I’m going to delete your e-mail quicker than it takes Sarah Palin to say “Gotcha” at some tea party gathering.

Yup…there’s a lot of junk being delivered to e-mail boxes all across the internet and the best thing about receiving them is that you can delete them before they take up too much valuable space in your e-mailbox. I mean, you have got to make sure that you have enough space in your e-mail account for all of the fart jokes – I mean – if there is one thing that we all need it’s that special e-mail that describes all of the various kinds of farts one makes…it’s not only funny to read, but it provides a very valuable service to all of its readers…giving names to our farts…and don’t get me started on the need for more dick jokes.

Well, I’ve got to go and check my e-mail. Ta – Ta!

We Can Only Wish That Our Dad Was This Funny

2010-05-08T19:53:00.003-04:00

I want to thank Justin Halpern’s girlfriend for dumping him. I don’t know why she dumped him, but I want to thank her anyway. You see, if the twenty-eight year-old Justin hadn’t been dumped by his girlfriend he would not have had to leave Los Angeles and move back home with his seventy-three year-old father, Sam in San Diego, who the world is going to soon discover as one of the most colorful characters anywhere.

To Justin, Sam is “like Socrates, but angrier, and with worse hair” and he has an opinion on just about everything from Grape Nuts to a fear of waking up one day and only getting the USA Network on his television set. (Which I would have to agree is a pretty nasty fear to have to live with).

Justin is very much aware that his Dad is probably one of the funniest men anywhere – which is why after moving back home with his parents last August, Justin decided to set up a Twitter account called “Shit That My Dad Says”. Working within the Twitter constrictions of 140 characters or lees – Justin began sharing some of his Dad’s hilarious thoughts and observations and within a month his Twitter page was an internet sensation.

Brace yourself – Justin’s Twitter account has, as of this writing, over 1.3 million followers and it has spawned a book (on sale now at your favorite bookstore) that gives you some of the stories behind the tweets and paints a hilarious portrait of a pretty unique father-son relationship. But, there’s more to this story – besides the successful Twitter account and the book – CBS is filming a pilot based on the book and the Tweets with William Shatner as his dad.

How funny is Justin Halpern’s dad? I’ll let you be the judge.

“A parent’s only as good as their dumbest kid. If one wins a Nobel Prize but the other gets robbed by a hooker, you failed.”

“I don’t get it; I sweat, I smell fine. You sweat, you smell like mule shit….Relax, she’s on the treadmill next to you, she knows.”

“No, I’m not a pessimist. At some point the world shits on everybody. Pretending it ain’t shit makes you an idiot, not an optimist.”

“You can watch the house while I’m gone. Just don’t call me unless something’s on fire, and don’t screw in my bed.”

“Mom is smarter than you…No? Well, ask yourself this; has mom ever unknowingly had toilet paper hanging out of her ass?...Mom 1. You 0.”

“It’s never the right time to have kids, but it’s always the right time for screwing. God’s not a dumbshit. He knows how it works.”

“The whole world is fueled by bullshit…What? The kid asked me for advice on his science fair project so I’m giving it to him.”

“Everybody’s broke, so here’s the rule for Christmas this year; if you still shit your pants, you get a present. Otherwise tough shit.”

“Nobody is that important. They eat, shit, and screw, just like you. Maybe not shit like you, you got those stomach problems.”

“You worry too much. Eat some bacon…What? No, I got no idea if it’ll make you feel better, I just made too much bacon.

“If mom calls, tell her I’m shitting…son, marriage is about not having to lie about taking a shit.”

“That woman was sexy…Out of your league? Son. Let women figure out why they won’t screw you, don’t do it for them.”

“I wanted to see Detroit win. I’ve been there. It’s like God took a shit on a parking lot. They deserve some good news.”

“I’m sitting in one of those TGI Friday’s places, and everyone looks like they want to shove a shotgun in their mouth.”

“The worst thing you can be is a liar…Okay fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but THEN, number two is liar. Nazi 1, Liar 2.

“You know, sometimes it’s nice having you around. But now ain’t one of those times. Now gimmie the remote we’re not watching this bullshit.”

I’ve just given you a taste of some of the tweets that you’ll find at www.twitter.com/shitmydadsays or you can pick up a copy of the book at Barnes and Noble, Borders or Amazon.com. And let’s cross our fingers that the nimrods at CBS buys the pilot so we can watch William Shatner deliver some of the philosophical musings of Sam Halpern every week. Wouldn't you watch this show to see William Shatner playing a cantankerous but funny old fart? It would be "must see TV" in my house.

Update: Since this post was originally posted -- CBS has announced at its recent upfront meetings with advertisers and the media that they have picked up "Shit My Dad Says" with William Shatner for the fall 2010 season. The show will be called "#@%& My Dad Says" in all announcements for the show and not the original title of the book and the Twitter page.

Myrtle, With Love -- From Tubby

2010-05-05T11:20:00.001-04:00

As many of you know, my Mother died of cancer a little over eight years ago and she’s still in my thoughts in one way or another every single day. Whether my girlfriend Marty and I are taking a drive in the country and we spot some house with what we call, “A Marion porch”, (which is basically a big front porch that my Mom always wanted, but never got to enjoy one in her life), or laughing at something our grandchildren has done that we wish that my Mom was alive to see it for herself.. One of the hardest things about my Mom not being alive is realizing how much time I wasted when she was here. I wish I could have just one day back to tell her how much I love her and how much she means to me – but we all know that that is not possible.

I may not be able to tell my Mom how much I love her – but I still have some time to tell another person who has meant a lot to me how I feel and in a roundabout way – you could call this woman my second Mother.

Her name is Myrtle Graves and if there was ever a woman who should receive an award for being a Mother – it would be Myrtle. Myrtle, along with her husband Bob, are the proud parents of nine kids – ten, if you want to count me (the chubby little fat kid from across the street who usually found his way into your kitchen at around dinner time).

Doctors have recently told Myrtle that she a large cancer mass near the lungs and it’s inoperable. I can’t imagine how I would handle news like that, but Myrtle is handling it pretty well. As she told me on the phone, “all things come to an end”, and you can’t really argue with that logic, can you?

It’s only been a few months or so that I finally was able to reconnect with Myrtle and her family after some seven years or so. Her daughter, Pat, had given me a phone number where I could reach Myrtle, but before I had a chance to do so, I received a phone call from her. It was a Monday night that Myrtle called and we must have chatted non-stop for a good half-hour or so and there literally was tears in my eyes the moment that I hung up the phone. Talking with Myrtle brought back all of those good things I remembered growing up on the east side of Flint and hearing Myrtle’s infectious laugh only made me smile even bigger. It’s easy to make Myrtle laugh – all I had to do is give her an example or two of how stupid my sister is and she was laughing up a storm.

I can’t tell you the exact time or how I connected with Myrtle and the entire Graves family – it just happened. I would come home from school and instead of going home to an empty house – I usually ended up across the street at the Graves house. We’d watch “the soaps” (General Hospital, One Life to Live, and Dark Shadows) and when dinner was ready – I usually grabbed a plate and joined everyone. (Luckily, my Mom could cook and she’d make up for me eating the Graves out of house and home with an occasional pie, cake or some cookies – especially near the holidays.)

If you were visiting the Graves family – sooner or later you would be talking and laughing up a storm. Some of those conversations took place at the kitchen table over a game of Crazy Eights or Aggravation – or – it was getting together on a hot summer night on the Graves’ front porch with a cold ice tea or an ice cold bottle of Coke that you bought at Jack’s Trading Post.

Those were the days, Myrt! I wouldn't mind being able to go could back in time and enjoy another one of those Saturday night get-togethers at Andy and Millie’s place next door, too. You, Andy and Millie sitting around the table enjoying a cold beer or two and listening to country music on the radio while we kids drank pop and played pool. Back then, we would make fun of that “hillbilly music”on the radio – but now that I have gotten older – I now appreciate a lot of that music and we’d probably come to an agreement today that that was the real country music – not this rock n’ roll crap that they’re passing off as country today.

I know that I have been rambling on about things, but there’s one thing that I want you to know Myrt – I want you to know that you did pretty good. Nobody’s going to give you that special Mother’s award that you justly deserve – but I want you to look around you and know that there’s one thing that you can be proud of and that’s your children. All in all – you did pretty good with those young ‘uns that you brought into this world. Oh sure, there was a little bump here and bump there and nights that you wondered how you were going to keep everything going – but you did it! Your kids know that every decision that you made – even if it made them angry at first – you made because you loved them and wanted only the best for them. And…just for your information everything doesn’t come to an end – because a little bit of you lives in each one of your children and grand children and all of the people that you have touched.

Your children love you, Myrtle and I love you, too. May your journey be as peaceful and as beautiful as you have been to all of the lives you have touched.

Since this blog was originally posted, Myrtle Graves died at her daughter’s home in Texas, on Monday afternoon, May 17, 2010. In a conversation with one of her sons on Tuesday night – I reminded him that with his Mom’s passing – the family goes on and his Mother was more than just a link to his past, she was the glue that held everyone and everything together. You keep the memory and the spirit of your Mother alive by keeping the family going. No one says that it will be easy – but look at it as a beautiful tribute to the great lady that your Mother was.

New Coke, A Bunless Chicken Sandwich at KFC and The Return of Fizzies (Sort Of)

2010-04-27T15:32:00.001-04:00

Pop a top and Celebrate the New Coke

It’s been a while since I rambled on about this, that and whatever – so I thought now is as good a time as any to unleash an end of the month edition of Frostbites – a collection of thoughts put together in that dot-dot-dot journalistic tradition of the late Bob Talbert and Larry King’s old USA Today columns.

Coca-Cola recently celebrated an anniversary – an anniversary that they are happy to forget – the day that they introduced “New Coke” to world. Yup, it was twenty-five years ago – on April 23, 1985 – that Coca-Cola took original Coke off the grocer’s shelves and replaced it with a newly reformulated Coke and people around the world instantly responded with a loud “WHAT THE ……!!!!”

In the 70s and 80s – Coca-Cola was getting their ass handed to them by Pepsi – who was aggressive in the marketing of their product. While Coke commercials were out there “teaching the world to sing in perfect harmony”…Pepsi was taking to the streets and putting their cola to the test in side-by-side taste tests against Coke and Pepsi was coming up the winner. I can remember seeing people line up to take the taste test that Pepsi had set up in one of the local stores that I use to shop at in Flint and seeing people choose their product over Coke right before their eyes was pretty darn convincing. Coke was taking some hard hits in Pepsi’s advertising and they had to respond and their response – New Coke!

Supposedly – this New Coke had been taste tested and all the research came back to Coke that this new Coke was the way to go. Outside of the normal store distribution – McDonald’s restaurants sell more Coca-Cola than anyone else. To make sure that New Coke tasted like New Coke – millions of dollars was spent just to send an army of technicians to McDonald’s restaurants throughout the world just to make sure that they had the correct syrup to carbonated water ratio for their fountain soft drink dispensers. Coca-Cola did everything they could to make sure that the introduction of New Coke would be a success – but little did they know that Coke drinkers around the world would reject it.

Eventually – Coke realized the errors of their way and began selling “Classic Coke” along side New Coke (which wasn’t selling at all and is no longer being bottled). This mistake in marketing cost Coca-Cola plenty and it has taken a long time for them to fully recover. So, now you know why Coca-Cola wasn't acknowledging this historic date and celebrating the anniversary of a marketing disaster.

Bite Into This -- The KFC Double Down

Anyone who reads this blog knows that I have a fondness for good ole American fast food. I have sang the praises of Long John Silver’s Baja Fish Taco and I have given a glowing thumbs up at Wendy’s Bacon and Blue Burger and their ninety-nine cents Spicy Chicken Nuggets – what am I going to sample next? I am really tempted to visit one of the local KFC restaurants in the area and wrap my lips around their new “Double Down Chicken Sandwich” – the sandwich so huge that it doesn’t even have a bun.

Even though KFC is really pushing this new sandwich in their national commercials – nutritionists, dieticians and people who generally care about your health – are warning people to stay as far away from this sandwich as possible. This sandwich isn’t going to kill you – but it’s going to give it a kick start to some blocked arteries and elevated blood pressure in some who do sample it.

When you read how KFC describes the Double Down on their web page – you’re tempted to go out and try one. KFC tells you that “this one-of-a-kind sandwich features two thick and juicy boneless white meat chicken filets (Original Recipe® or Grilled), two pieces of bacon, two melted slices of Monterey Jack and pepper jack cheese and Colonel's Sauce.” It sounds like of interesting – even without a bun – but just one Double Down Chicken Sandwich contains 540 calories, 32 grams of fat and – and brace yourself -- 1,380 milligrams of sodium. And if you think that the grilled version is going to be a bit healthier for you – think again – because the grilled Double Down maybe be lower in calories and fat with just 460 calories and 23 grams of fat – but it has even more sodium than the fried version – coming in at 1,430 milligrams of good ole salt!

I’m sure that some of the burgers that I have been throwing down my throat are pretty high in calories, fat, etc….so, all of the doom and gloom that people are spreading about how bad this sandwich is for you doesn’t bother me. The thing that’s turning me off from wanting to try it is its price. – according to the Los Angeles Times – LA KFCs are charging $5.49 for the Double Down – the equivalent price of one of their six piece meals – at that price I could bring home a bag of those fish tacos from LJS. If I do decide to give this sandwich a try – I’ll let you know – so keep your eye on this blog.

And since we’re talking junk fast food – when is McDonalds going to bring back the McRib to us folks in Michigan? I know that the McRib is on the menu at McDonalds in some other states – but it’s yet to make its appearance in Michigan and it seems like the McRib is a yearly special sandwich anyway…so c’mon guys…bring back the McRib.

There is one fast-food item that I want to rave about – Onion Rings at Sonic. The only time that I get to visit a Sonic is when I take a trip over to Flint to do something and you don’t have to twist my arm much to get me to drive over to Sonic for these rings. First – they’re huge! These rings are made to dip in ketchup (or whatever sauce you choose) and don’t order the small size – order the biggest size that they have. Sonic uses cornmeal or something in their onion ring batter and just saying that they’re delicious would be short-changing Sonic – these onion rings are to die for. If Sonic’s burgers were as good as their onion rings – they would be one dangerous fast-food restaurant – but every burger that I have had from the place have been pretty lame.

In the every thing that’s old is new again department: If you were a kid in the 60s – odds are pretty good that you’ll remember Fizzies – a tablet that you put into a glass of water to make a delicious refreshing soft drink. Fizzies came in a lot of flavors – such as grape and orange – but the one that I remembered best was root beer. If my memory serves me correctly – a package of about six or eight tablets cost something like twenty-nine cents….well worth the price for all of the fun kids had with the tablets.

Four decades or so have pass and now Kool-Aid and General Foods bring back memories of Fizzies (although they don’t call them that) with a new product called Kool-Aid Fun Fizz. Just like Fizzies – these flavored-filled tablets dissolve in water to make a refreshing glass of….Kool-Aid…with out all of the mess and bother. I have been able to sample two of the flavors – fruit punch and grape – and they are pretty tasty – but aren’t cheap. A package of six Kool-Aid Fun Fizz is retail priced in the $1.99-$2.29 price range and each one of the tablets only makes an eight-ounce glass of Kool-Aid.

If Kool-Aid and General Foods are in a retro food mood – maybe they could buy the rights to and bring back PDQ chocolate milk mix and all of the other flavors of PDQ milk mix such as strawberry and egg nog.